No no no! You're not supposed to open up and share your feelings with your loved ones. What were you thinking?!?
You're supposed to surprise her when she comes home from shopping by being all dolled up in her ill-fitting clothes, (but still with a beard) and strutting up and down the kitchen, (the very first time you ever try on makeup is the perfect oportunity for this, btw).
Right after the bag of groceries hits the floor, you supposed to say (in an loud obnoxious voice) "THIS IS THE REAL ME!!!" Then run away fast.
Sharing feelings, bah! Do it the manly way!
