My ex wife was what my attorney told me divorce lawyers call a "new welfare yuppie". (today's version of the "welfare mom" who had more kids to get more welfare money. Today the "yuppie" strategy involves a woman targeting a guy with money. She has sex with him and gets pregnant on purpose. Then he marries her and she proceeds to have blatant affairs until he finally divorces her. She ends up with a big settlement and hefty child support payment to live on.)

Anyway, I was the second victim of my ex. She had a six year old when we met. She constantly painted a picture of me as a "paranoid" husband with ridiculous accusations of her infidelity. Her typical routine was lunch or drinks with the current boyfriend, and always denying it ever happened. About a year and a half into the marriage, I decided for some reason to get a first hand view of one of her lunch dates with her boyfriend (#4 so far). I knew the place and time (she was not very good at concealing info)they were meeting downtown.

I dressed for "success" in full feminine clothes, and headed downtown. I figured I had a great excuse if things went south and I had to explain my dressing to somebody. I was simply "spying on my cheating wife". Hey, it was good enough excuse to get me out the door...hehehe.

All of the little cafe lunch spots around the State Capital Building have outside tables. Many are across from the public benches and green areas on grounds of the Capital property. I parked a few blocks away, sat on the concrete retaining wall along the sidewalk, and ate my sack lunch while snapping cell phone camera pics of my ex holding hands with this guy I had met a few times when we partied with some of my ex's "old friends".

It was definately a rush being dressed and out in public for the first time. Combined with being close enough to my ex to see the diamonds in her wedding ring sparkling in the sun as she held hands with her "friend", was quite an experience,, to say the least.

I sat there for awhile, watching them through my dark shades (which I actually "borrowed" from her!), clicked a few pics, and headed back to my car. There were lots of people sitting around eating lunch and enjoying the sunny day. Nobody freaked out, so I figured I pulled it off pretty well. I did not talk to anyone and nobody approached me, so that was a relief. I did catch my heel on the cracks in the sidewalk twice on the walk to the car, but regained my gait quickly without taking any dives onto the sidewalk. By the time I reached my car my black dress was soaked with perspiration from the excitement. Glad I picked that color! I also discovered I had managed to sit in pigeon poop, which was all over my butt. I bet that was a hoot for people walking behind me...lol.

Anyway, the "mission" was a success, I guess. I asked her what she did for lunch when she got home. Standard answer..."Nothing, just ate at my desk". No, I never confronted her. I rarely did. I had nothing to prove to anyone but myself. I just erased the pics since I knew I would have many more in the future. I finally divorced her after about 3 years of that nonsense. She got what she was after...money. I got what I was after...my freedom (and lots of practice being a "Black Op's CD"...lol.

I actually found out that I am pretty damn good at it...So watch-out...someday that hot chic sitting across the street, watching you eat your lunch...just might be ME!