The moderator has suggested that I refrain from making certain responses to this thread, and I agree.

I refer you all to the new post I made yesterday concerning, "Living The Good Lie."
I think much of what is said in that article is more productive than most of the things being said here.

I have said, several times, all I can say about the OP's original postings. The long response by the OP about "Are you an attorney?" etc. will do nothing to handle the OPs personal issues at home - which I think need more of the OP's time than this forum does.

Time will tell how wise it was and is for the OP to write and expound on such topics as, "My closet is my sanctuary." Clearly it wasn't and isn't... I have serious doubts about the outcome of such a way of dealing with reality, and I have expressed them for the OP, and others, to consider.

This is a new forum to me, yet my impression so far is that it tends to promote and favor repetitive posts about, "I just got my first panties!" and, "Do you think she knows?" and, "Should I tell?" rather than encourage and support actual problem solving. Maybe the world needs that, maybe not.

In this case, the OP was "nearly" outed by a family friend, then spent several days defending the notion that they were/are entitled to stay in the closet they had just, or, nearly, been dragged out of...

Since the horse was already out of the barn, as we say here in Texas, arguing that the horse should have been left alone is a waste of of the OPs time and effort when it comes to the OP's personal situation. The "near" outing should serve as a notice to do something besides close and lock the empty barn's door.

And, there is no "next time" in the OPs case. Either the OP has been discovered, or, they now keenly understand they will be - and the price of not dealing with these known facts will keep going up... Fear... I can think of no other reason why the OP would drag this discussion out so long against myself and others, instead of work out a solution to a pressing problem at home.

The problem the OP has, as I understand things, is not ultimately the crossdressing, family, friends, or, "society." It is, as many other posts have shown, the deception being practiced by the OP against the OP, the OP's family, the OP's future, etc.

Frankly, I can see little for the OP to do other than either give up crossdressing, or, to change how crossdressing is managed in their life.

That's about all I can say about this particular thread and how it has gone - which is not a new topic or a new response in my life...

I've been discussing this sort of thing - usually brought about by some personal crisis like the OPs, for about thirty years now with any number of TS/TG/CD/Bi/Gay people - who would wish the world was different, but slowly have to understand that it isn't, and won't be, until they change.

Frankly, given the number of very wealthy and very successful gays and lesbians that most of us could list easily, starting with Ellen, Rosie, and Doogie, I am surprised that there is still so much "doom and gloom" about this sort of thing.

I do wonder, however, what will become of crossdressers in the next twenty years or so... From what I've seen of life, there will be less support or tolerance for CDs in the gay and lesbian community (among others), mostly because CDs bring too little of value to the gay and lesbian community, or, - because CDs are generally so tangled up in their own webs - to anyone else.

Really, this tempest in a teapot on this thread has gone nowhere because the closet is nowhere to go. Gays and lesbians are now openly getting jobs, buying houses, and getting married. CDs, already having most of that all along, are still doing very little to advance their own issues, so what use can they be to others?

I have been asked several times in this thread, "What are you doing here?"

Maybe not much more than serving as a target for those with, seriously, nothing better to do - and no place else to do it.

I have been asked the same question by people in the gay pride parades, several of which are coming up in my area again soon...

In the past, I have said:

"I'm here because anyone who crosses a certain line in life, winds up on this side of the line we're both now on."

I'm not changing my response to that question yet, but I'm thinking I may.

Crossdressing, as a subset of life, is beginning to look like an immature response to life.

I guess you can still learn something new every day... It may just depend on how much attention you pay to what goes on around you - not just what's in you.