If every CD came out at the same time would it change public acceptance?

[RADER]

Can we wait like 4 years?? I need to get my law degree... I'm going to be the richest crossdressing divorce lawyer on the planet!! Lol.

Karren: you just need a can of Coors Beer, It has the "BAR EXAM" on the can, so why wait 4 years.
Rader

[ReineD]

I can honestly say I didn't lose a single friend in the process of coming out as a crossdresser. The image of me dressed as a girl, or more often, of me as a guy in women's clothes, has not been something that my friends have had a problem with. Many people almost seem to forget about it, as a nonissue.

If they were close friends before they found out, then this makes sense, and even more so depending on the area in which you or others live (urban & liberal), and perhaps age group (under 40).

But, if a person lives in a less urban or liberal environment and is looking to expand their circle of friends (perhaps in the 40s-ish and older bracket), I wonder if presenting as a full on woman (not as a man who wears a skirt) would get in the way of doing this? Not that people would be rude to them or anything, but I'm afraid they simply would choose to not get too close?

[Karren H]

Karren: you just need a can of Coors Beer, It has the "BAR EXAM" on the can, so why wait 4 years.
Rader

Wanted to make sure I had enough staff to handle the flood!! And thinking of having a special deal for cd.com members. Put me on a retainer and when your wife comes to me for a divorce I will kick back 15% of what she gets from you... Back to you... And free makeup advice for a year! Lol.

[Fab Karen]

But, if a person lives in a less urban or liberal environment and is looking to expand their circle of friends (perhaps in the 40s-ish and older bracket), I wonder if presenting as a full on woman (not as a man who wears a skirt) would get in the way of doing this? Not that people would be rude to them or anything, but I'm afraid they simply would choose to not get too close?

Who wants phony friends? I can NOT be friends with a bigot, whether that's about people of color, gay people, TG people, etc.

[SweetIonis]

If every CD came out there would be a huge public backlash and many a relationship would be broken.

[Dawn cd]

The thing that would make "coming out day" a success is getting straight people to join in. On Dec 21, 2012 (as Rader suggested) we should invite everybody--and I mean EVERYBODY--to wear an obvious article of clothing of the opposite gender. Just as straights march these days in the Gay Pride parade, we should invite straights to be a TG for a day.

I'm sorry, I don't mean "straights," I mean cis-people, the un-TGs.

[docrobbysherry]

Look how well it's worked for gays and lesbians!

[RachelOKC]

I've been coming out to a lot of people lately and I have to tell you I have been dealing with a horrific onslaught of...

"That's cool."
"I'm glad you're being yourself."
"Oh, I thought you were just gay."
"I appreciate you opening up to me."
"That's a fantastic dress, can I borrow it?"
"So THAT'S what it is about you!"
"You seem a lot happier."
"Wow...you have...boobs."

Mostly it's a big non-event.

I've got neighbors who know even thought I haven't specifically told them and they're as...ahem...neighborly as ever.

I've got pics on Facebook out there for the world to see. A few comments here and there, all positive. Nothing negative and I'll take most of the silence from most others as "I didn't notice" or *shrug*, or "whatever, man." Even the GLBT-phobic christian fundamentalist in-laws haven't said a word which is fine with me. They fill my news feed with Jesus, I fill theirs with lesbigaters. Fair trade.

Hell, I even half-outed myself to my boss at my new job. She and her wife (yes, one of THOSE couples *gasp*) are going to adopt a child and I told her about a GLBT parents group we sometimes attend. She was glad for the info and I'm sure she's wondering now how I figure into all that. (I'll let her dangle on that one for a while...)

It's not all wine and roses; I don't like the invasive questions. I don't like having to explain everything. When I (in modo femina) met some friends and acquantences at Pride, I got called by my male name and labeled as he which was a bit weird for me. I don't like getting the hairy eyeball from strangers. And I *really* hate the word transvestite (for the record, I'm not big on crossdresser either). All small prices to be paid though for freedom as a TG person, so I'll deal with it.

Of course TG people aren't going to all come out en masse - it's hard enough to get people to come to a safe and welcoming support group. I'll tell you this though, go walk in a Trans March or a Pride Parade sometime and feel the strength, energy, passion, and hope present in the mass of others like yourselves. You cannot possibly imagine it until you have experienced it and you will wonder why you didn't do it a long time ago.

If we as trans people ever want OUR turn at the ideal of life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness, then we need more of us to stop being chickenshit, stop pretending the closet is such a great place to be, and stand up and speak out for ourselves and others like us. Plenty of groups have done it before us, now it's our turn.

[SweetIonis]

Political speeches rarely change reality. Obama promised change we can be believe in, all we got was more of the same, or, depending on your perspective worse.

[Cheryl T]

Sounds like we need a National CD Day! ... No, not Halloween either...lol.

We should start a movement and pick a day for all of us to just dress in our best and go meet the world en masse.

[BLUE ORCHID]

It's sure something to think about.

Orchid

[girlygirly]

Sounds like we need a National CD Day! ... No, not Halloween either...lol.

We should start a movement and pick a day for all of us to just dress in our best and go meet the world en masse.

I think I would be able to come up with a fun reason to be participating in "Dress Like A Girl Day", and I already have plenty to wear! It would be a lot easier if it were part of some stupid advertising promotion, or something equivalent to Sadie Hawkin's Day, instead of being a "National CD Day", where I would be labeling myself by participating.

[Badtranny]

It might change "public" acceptance, but nothing could erase the image of me dressed like a girl from the minds of my family and friends.

I don't even want public acceptance, I can take care of myself in public just fine. I would be happier with not having to explain it to those who feel they already know me well, so I'll just keep it to myself and a few very trusted people I know.

Okay, I know now why this comment upset me. I wasn't sure at first but after thinking about it for awhile I realized that first line hit me like a slap. I don't know if you meant it this way, but it really feels like you think that looking like a woman is somehow demeaning. That women are less than men and by "dressing like a girl" you are presenting an image of yourself in a much lesser capacity than you are known by your family and friends.

I'm not judging you or even wagging my finger, because I was also brought up to believe that the worse thing you can be is something less than a man. It just made me sad to see it articulated by one of my TG sisters.

Unless I'm totally just projecting, and in that case ...nevermind. '-)

[ReineD]

Okay, I know now why this comment upset me. I wasn't sure at first but after thinking about it for awhile I realized that first line hit me like a slap. I don't know if you meant it this way, but it really feels like you think that looking like a woman is somehow demeaning. That women are less than men and by "dressing like a girl" you are presenting an image of yourself in a much lesser capacity than you are known by your family and friends.

I don't presume to speak for girlygirly here, I just want to give my impression of this statement. I take it that CDers like girlygirly don't feel that being a woman is "less than", just there is an awareness that people in general do not look kindly on men who wear dresses, even though they might not say so out loud. Many people still believe in the far corners of their minds in the "CD stereotype" (men who do this are in some way odd or perverted), simply because these people have very little understanding of what it's all about.

[VioletJourney]

Sounds like we need a National CD Day! ... No, not Halloween either...lol.

We should start a movement and pick a day for all of us to just dress in our best and go meet the world en masse.

That would be fun as long as everyone gets to participate and not just CDs. I think lots of guys would love a guilt free day to try wearing a dress and some heels

[ReineD]

That would be fun as long as everyone gets to participate and not just CDs. I think lots of guys would love a guilt free day to try wearing a dress and some heels

The challenge would be to have them take it seriously, and not do it because it is one big joke for them. I've seen enough of that in youtube "charity" pageants.

[SweetIonis]

Perhaps it's a good thing there is low acceptance. Could be nature's way of diverting people away from a dead end street.

[Princess Ludwyna]

Ahahahaha!
I'm just visualising the scene, like a horror movie :
"Land of the CDs".

All transvestites, crossdressers and the whole T family going in the street simultaneously... with difficulties walking in high heels...

"Normal" People shivering, shouting and running scared everywhere to escape as if it was a zombie invasion...
The united nations sending the army.
That would be fun.

Erh no.

Just kidding.

People would certainly be surprised to see their bosses, neighbours and so on in skirts or dresses. Maybe there would be an acceptance, but i think it's like when people see UFOs. They will deny the fact. It was a collective hallucination.

[HairyBethCD]

More than just crossdressing. I like the idea of all of a sudden, everyone knowing everyone else's kink. IME very people are truly vanilla and various people I've known over the years have admitted to all sorts of things (probably too strong to mention here) they're into but in nearly all cases, they are petrified of being found out. I'm sure we'd all be much happier in bed if we just told thr truth about our wishes and desires.

[NicoleScott]

My boss would say: "Wow, I had no idea there were so many crossdressers! Oh, and good luck with your new job."

[JOJO44]

My boss would say: "Wow, I had no idea there were so many crossdressers! Oh, and good luck with your new job."

I hear that loud and clear!

[HairyBethCD]

My boss would say: "Wow, I had no idea there were so many crossdressers! Oh, and good luck with your new job."

Thank God I live in a country where that sort of thing is illegal!

[Fab Karen]

"People would certainly be surprised to see their bosses, neighbours and so on in skirts or dresses."
Many wouldn't be recognized.

Would everyone everywhere instantly embrace us? No. But acceptance would be larger, and things would keep getting better, just as gay people have learned.

[SweetIonis]

My boss would say: "Wow, I had no idea there were so many crossdressers! Oh, and good luck with your new job."

LMAO!!! I probably wouldn't get past security!

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

If they were close friends before they found out, then this makes sense, and even more so depending on the area in which you or others live (urban & liberal), and perhaps age group (under 40).

But, if a person lives in a less urban or liberal environment and is looking to expand their circle of friends (perhaps in the 40s-ish and older bracket), I wonder if presenting as a full on woman (not as a man who wears a skirt) would get in the way of doing this? Not that people would be rude to them or anything, but I'm afraid they simply would choose to not get too close?

I live in Los Angeles *now.* I came out in Ohio, and before I moved away I lived there for almost another year openly crossdressing amongst a mixed bag of friends and acquaintances (i.e., not "close friends") in a field (stand up comedy) that has a much more macho streak amongst many of its practitioners than you'd expect, even here in LA.

Many people still believe in the far corners of their minds in the "CD stereotype" (men who do this are in some way odd or perverted), simply because these people have very little understanding of what it's all about.

Isn't that the whole point of this thread though? Saying, hey if we were all open about ourselves and what we do, maybe we could show people we're not a stereotype but we're real people that they know?

I think I would be able to come up with a fun reason to be participating in "Dress Like A Girl Day", and I already have plenty to wear! It would be a lot easier if it were part of some stupid advertising promotion, or something equivalent to Sadie Hawkin's Day, instead of being a "National CD Day", where I would be labeling myself by participating.

This type of response really shouldn't bother me but it does. It reminds me of the counterpoint comments in the other thread currently trending which is about "out" CDs judging "closet" CDs. I personally don't think we have a right to tell anyone else to be in or out of the closet, it's a personal decision. I agree with the premise of this thread that if we all did, it would be better for all of us, but that's an ideal, not an insistence.

However, this comment above is basically saying, "hey if you can find a way for me to take advantage of a loophole and be openly crossdressing, sure, but don't expect me to actually call myself a crossdresser!"