It is lying when the other person has a stake in what you do in life. This would be wives and maybe in some cases business partners.
What do I hope to gain when I come out? I hope that the person I tell will not have any change in feelings toward me. That they will know now why I have acted in some manner before that they found confusing maybe. OR that they will step back and realize that they actually KNOW someone that they just made a joke about or disparaging remark. That when they think something is funny it may actually be hurtful to someone they know, there are real people behind their ignorance (This is rare in my circle). I also hope that by letting more and more people know about me that sometime it will not be something that "we" have to feel we need to be ashamed of or that we should have to feel the need to "hide". Call it putting a face on it. That "we" are not all stupid, insipid clowns who flounce or act dumb. That we are not perverts who need to be kept away from society. That we encompass all the spectrum of sexuality. That we can be fathers, respected businesspeople, grandparents, soldiers, and maybe even President. We are not murderers with psychological problems like the movies show. We are not the creep.
The more we hide, the more the bad stereotypes can grow. It has happened withe other minorities for millennia. You don't believe those stereotypes anymore do you? You probably do have some still filtering in the back of your mind. How do we dispel these? By showing that they are not true. How can you do that when you sit and hide and when a person says something you know is wrong you don't stand up? If you don't it becomes "correct". This was proven in the 30's in Germany.
