Quote Originally Posted by JessHaust View Post
This board is full of girls who stay at home, wishing they could, would, might maybe, ............go out dressed. And most of you look at those of us who say we do and either don't believe it, or just think "sure you can, but things are different for me'
Well I really need to say, BS!, if I can do it you can. The only thing stopping you is you. All the fear, all the doubt is within you, and the solution is there as well, within you.
It's hard , but once you do it, it's like pandora's box, it will never go back in, and you will be so glad you let it out.
Find a group, find a friend, it's not hard, just the right words into Google, and there you are. (meet up, transgender,cross-dress and your city)
Do you really want to stay home, keep this bottled up inside yourself, forever? Is chatting with unseen, unknown people on the internet all you are looking for? I can't believe it.
The world is a really big, really forgiving wonderful place if you will just give it the chance. People will surprise you with understanding. You are the most critical thing in your life, not them, you only have to step outside to see this.
OK, there I have pissed off most of you, scared some others and maybe rung a bell with others, but If this arrogant, self righteous, hurtful diatribe of mine has motivated just one of you to actually put on your best dress and go out and enjoy life, it was worth it.
I wish it was as easy as you say but there are consequences to what people do and depending on their situations it simply isn't worth the consequences for many. The social stigma to it varies widely depending on where you live and from different places people work and different families they come from. When faceing strong social stigma from all sides being "found out" can lead to a lot more than simply people's displeasure, it can lead to inability to continue at your job, hostile relations with relatives, open hostility to your presence from your community, and in some cases outright violence.

In addition to this we have people in our lives who could be greatly impacted. I know I don't want my wife to have to face these kinds of things because of me. Even if there isn't any signficant other in our lives the stigma can still taint the lives of various family members. The consequences to us alone are dire at times but it isn't even all about us. We can tell people to just get over it but bottom line is there is more of them and they can have a greater impact on our lives and the lives of those close to us than we can.

I am not saying there is never a good time to come out, but there is some long considering to do before you do so, and a lot of factors that go just beyond us that go into it. Yeah it is a big part of who we are, but it is not the whole of who we are and to just disreguard all those for the sake of our expression of gender is just reckless and self destructive. We all have to weigh our own situations and determine how little or how much we risk and how likely that is and that isn't going to be the same for anyone.

For those who have little to risk and little likelihood for loss I would encourage them by all means get out there and let the world know who you really are, but for those with much to lose and a high chance of doing so a lot more care and consideration must be given and may result in just keeping it a secret forever.