Quote Originally Posted by Katesback View Post
Well Kitty I will tell you this. When I worked for the state doing HIV prevention targeting the trans population I was in contact with countless trans people. That of course includes CDs. From my observations I had a lot of the CDs talk to me in confidence about thier desires. Of course they wont talk turkey around the wife! I can say that a shocking number of them were wanting to transition but the one big common factor ALWAYS came into play. Marriage. They did not want to loose thier marriage!

Now of course these were CDs that had enough confidence to at least go into the public to some degree. I would suggest that thats a pretty small percentage of the CDs because I suspect the overwelming majority hide in thier houses ONLY. Of course the ones with a bit of confidence get a taste of womanhood and the wheels start turning.

Add to it the insidious word they like to use incorrectly, ACCEPTANCE. See if they have not gained any acceptance then they tend to hide and never express themselves but if they gain some sort of acceptance (in thier words) the clock starts ticking to wanting to transition. Why do I call acceptance insidious? Well because they incorrectly add to word participatory to it. Meaning they want thier wives to be actively participatory of thier activities.
I think this is an important conversation. Many so's are so confused by this "activity". They cling to the fact that their husband is just that ..... their husband, when the truth is quite a bit farther from that. Like I said us so's are only privy to the very tip of the iceberg and when this so called "pink fog" sets in we are so confused and scared. Many find the secrets thoughts of their husbands in e-mails to others or read hints of it on forums like this. When they confront their cd...... adament denial is what they get not an honest conversation of what really drives them. Trust me............the hurt over being lied to is a much harder hurdle to get over than dealing with and faceing the truth. Sure some marriages will fail when faced with the truth but many may not. We all deserve to be in relationships where our partners respect us enough to be up front and honest. Maybe when the time comes and the cd finally confesses they are more than that and they want boobs, hormones and to live 24/7 we won't have to crumble so much from being sold a lie, or feel like we waisted the best years of our lives and will now have to face retirement alone or with someone you never really knew.