Hi Marie,
I am 51 years old and have cross-dressed all my life. I am what would be described as the "text book" heterosexual cross-dresser. For us, dressing as a woman is a need not a desire and having our wife's support and/or understanding is crucial for our well being an happiness. It is my understanding that we are born CD and it is not a learned thing as is in the case with fetishes. I have memories of sneaking into my mother's closet to try some of her clothes on that go as far back as when I was about 3 years old. The need to dress has not gone and it was a source of discomfort because I did not know what was going on and used to feel guilty until I learned how things work and accepted myself.
My wife is understanding and has known since before we started dating. She is not thrilled about it but since she knows what it means to me and loves me enough to accept me as I am, she lets me express this need within certain rules that we have agreed on. I understand that it is impossible for other people to understand this "bizarre" impulse and need since it deals with issues associated with sexuality. A heterosexual CD is not gay nor does he wants to become a woman. I guess it would be easier to understand if we fell into one of this two categories but we don't. We tend to be more loving, loyal and faithful husbands.
I hope this sheds some light on you. I have just become a member of this forum but have had over 30 years of experience investigating and dealing with this. Please feel free to contact me if you need me to clarify or elaborate on something that I have said.
