"Didn't sign up for this"

[ReineD]

My ex was a tomboy. Was into sports, liked to drive my truck instead of a car, wore sneakers/workboots, jeans and t shirt or sweats about 95% of the time. She liked my tool belt so much, she bought one of her own. So I thought she would at least have a clue as to why someone might want to adopt attire designed for the opposite gender. WRONG! Oh, so very wrong. Women reserve the right to wear mens clothes for themselves. They simply cannot understand a guy wanting to dress up like a girl.

I need to take exception to this. As unfair as it is (and I agree that it is unfair), women are now culturally allowed to be tomboys. Maybe it will be acceptable for men to be tomgirls in the future, but we're simply not there yet.

Still, women who are tomboys do not try to pass themselves off as men. It's common for girls to play sports. It's common for them to drive a truck. If I have to get some lumber for a project, I'd much rather use a truck than my car. It's more practical. And when I'm working on projects, a tool belt is handy. And unless your wife was wearing clothes purchased in men's stores, getting men's haircuts, and gluing fake hair on her face, she was not crossdressing. Women who wear the clothing appropriate to do the activities they enjoy doing are not CDers. They are instead dressing like independent, capable women, who have learned how to do all the stuff that requires wearing a toolbelt.

Likewise, a man is not crossdressing when he wears an apron while he's making the spaghetti sauce. Nor is he behaving like a woman when he sews a button on his shirt, vacuums, or changes the baby's diaper.

You can't compare a man who presents fully as a woman (makeup, wig, breast forms, on top of the clothes), to a woman who is handy and wears a toolbelt and drives a truck. But, if a man were to present as a man and wear a manskirt, (like women who wear women's jeans and flannel shirts), then you might make a comparison.