Sorry to take so long to get back to this!
To clarify for those who were asking, the Q in LGBTQ stands for "queer" or "genderqueer" - those who don't fit into either portion of a binary (male/female only) definition of gender. I suppose since in order to completely accurately label myself as cis-male, I probably wouldn't enjoy crossdressing, technically, I would fall closest to the "genderqueer" label.
I already am fairly active in at least a small portion of the local "alphabet" community, through attending local meetings and events with my wife. I've gotten to know about a dozen of the folks she works closely with in the community, they're all pretty cool, and they're all pretty cool with me as a "straight ally". Unfortunately there are no "T" representatives in their organization yet, so I really haven't found anyone through that circle that I could click with.
Part of the problem is that I'm no social butterfly and never will be, even in the nice quiet settings I prefer. The bar scene (yeah there's the one club here... it literally used to be named "The Club" back in the 90s) is not something I've even enjoyed. I almost never drink (no moral issues with it, I'm a control freak), I dance horribly, and I hate having to shout over loud music to be heard.
I've briefly looked into Tri-Ess, and need to look some more. The main problem is the nearest chapter is about 100 miles away. I guess it just boils down to the fact that I'm pretty much scared to seek out the local trans community. I'm not looking for a date, a hookup, or anything like that... just friends that understand the CD part of me. My fears are likely mostly not rational, but that doesn't make them less scary.
