I too was curious about how we show up on google - I tried searching a few topics which have come up recently, things on stickies, and the phrase 'transsexual forum' - the content doesn't place us high on google but the fact the TS forum is here, does.
And there are people here, even in Safe Haven, that do just that and post their summary for all to see.. I of course won't name names but we, and they, know who they are. They seem to revel in showing us how smart they are and how inconsistent and what liars some of us (like me) are. There are many on this forum that can confirm that nothing I say here is true.......Originally Posted by Sandra1746
Yes, this little "hobby" of others pisses me off. I am expecting a PM any time......
First, I don't understand, Why are we talking about just the TS forum? MY earlier post was about the whole site. I don't understand why just one section should be private other then the ones that already are.
I still strongly believe you should have to join and log in before you can read anything here.
I just googled my own screen name "BrandyJ" and it came up on the second page with this:
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...my-CD-bf/page3
This is a post I made on 08-20-2012 at 08:03 PM
I'd rather not be seen on google let alone anyone accessing this site reading all my posts in open forums.
My mention of identification via data mining was primarily directed to those in the "public at large" reading the freely available sections. Folks like bosses, bill collectors, neighbors, church members, etc. If someone with the ability to post (a CD.com member) does the data mining and uses that as adverse information; well that's just "catty". Those sorts will always be with us (unfortunately).
A fully private TS site would deprive those who are questioning their gender identity of one more source of information. This entire site (all sections) is a wealth of "human interest" stories that folks who are unsure of their identity can really benefit from (IMHO). It is WAY better than any of the porn sites or the "hyper religious" sites they will certainly encounter.
More $0.02,
Sandra1746
Presumably under the new system, TS posts will not appear in the "new posts" section. I'm not opposed to it, but I wonder if some people will begin to post only in the TS forum—effectively hiding there—and we will wind up with a private website within a public site.
I disagree Sandra. If it is important enough for them to read, then they can do as the home page suggests and join. This day and age of the Internet I'm all for more privacy even if I have nothing to hide. I stand by my earlier thoughts....We would have more members if we gave those that found us more security. I just closed down my Facebook BrandyJ account for that very reason. And believe me, there are many CD's that are more afraid of what others can find than me.
First thing I did when I found this site was create an account. But of course I started as a CD, I didn't really know about the TS forum at first (in fact, I didn't know anything about TS), but once I found it and started to read it, I felt more at home, lol.
"I'm not sure. But I'll never know unless I give it a shot."
Ok, I have a question. How many of our members lurked here for days, months, even a year or longer before feeling comfortable enough and trusting this site before becoming a member. Before joining this site I lurked for a very long time. The TS section is very educational for people searching for answers that may not be adressed in the CD section. My suggestion is don't fix something that isn't broke.
Linda
I don't think there is much incentive to join if you can read everything (the other side of the coin). I'm on the fence about it since we are kind of anonymous here but I do hate the lack of privacy on Facebook.
You obviously didn't see where this thread was then, did you?
To clarify for anyone under a misapprehension, we are talking about the TS FORUM ONLY.
How will it work, simple log off, then view what you can see without logging in. See the headings of each forum, then see what it says about them - MEMBERS ONLY, INVITATION ONLY. If the TS forum is changed, it will read MEMBERS ONLY. That means you HAVE to be a member of this forum to view any posts in it. Once you log in you will have full access to the posts, just as you do now.
Listen carefully to what is said, quite often you can hear what is not being said
The joy of correcting a mistake can bring pain to another
I would opt for more privacy. And like others being post-op, I would like to contribute to help my pre-op sisters/brothers but am concerned over maintaining a level of privacy I am comfortable with.
Just call Me: "W - O - M - A - N"
As King said: "I'm free at last, I'm free at last.
Thank God Almighty I'm free at last!"
When I first found the site, I wasn't quite ready for it. I read some postings, and then wandered away for about a month and came back again. The second time, I joined 2-3 days later when I found something I wanted to reply to. But my intro post was somewhat abrupt and not all that trusting.
But that was me, and I was remarkably "out" as soon as I finally realized that I wanted to dress in the clothes (e.g., dressed in public 3 weeks after my realization.) My experiences with other people suggest that a fair period of lurking and building trust is much more typical.
Special log-in or requirements would not really help.
The only true privacy setting on the web is - unless you don't mind if it is out there, don't post it t begin with, or at least don't use a real name and don't post photos of your face. Don't advertise your facebook page and then wonder how people found out.
But yeah like they said here, most of us are "out" anyways. Not like we are waiting for our wives to go to Spain for a month so we can so we can transition.
Random lurkers or pervs are probably not looking for info about HRT or the best surgeons.
It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.
hello,
I visited this site several times before I joined, trying to build up the confidence to join and post messages. It is a great resource and people like us tend to be a little timid about our hobby. It would be a great shame if it was changed.
Yes we could be caught and outed... but I would guess that most members do not use their real names and we can choose how much personal information we reveal.
luv J
I am in favor of having to be logged in to access this section.
Jacques, this discussion is not about making crossdressers.com harder to find, it is about giving a little more privacy to those members who already know they are transsexual and want to discuss what they are going through as well as to members who may be questioning whether they are transsexual and/or to SO's
Given that this discussion is specifically about the TS forum, do you think that the term "our hobby" might have been an unfortunate choice of words?
Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.
This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist :facepalm:
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
This made me smile...people can jerk off to the titles just as easily as the messages...we're not harming that crowd at all if its changed a bit..
Its a reasonable question to ask... who is this forum for?
this is not a hobby or a lifestyle.....if we assume that the forum is run for people that at a minimum care about transsexuality, even if simply curious, and even if curious for the "wrong" reasons, at a minimum why not set a bar that they simply log in?
why not communicate with new people in a friendly and open way...and ask the same of them...
Nobody has to use real names or post pics..set up a blank gmail account, make a screen name and you are in..
given how the last year or so went, i'd prefer to know that people at least stepped up to the minimal standard of logging into the site to read highly personal posts.
It would still be an open forum..and for people that feel its important to keep it a secret its a very easy thing to set your computer up in a way that keeps your surfing private (lurking is surfing too btw...if you visit the site as guest or as ramrodder69, you can still get caught)
...and if people can read all the topics they can decide for themselves whether its worth it to stop lurking and sign up to see what the discussion is all about..
Visitors only need to know that the sections are within the site. Making it available to all members, essentially like it is now is a good thing. those serious enough to become members, and hopefully contribute, and develop, and find themselves and realize their true self is transsexual need to have this resource. It took me many months before i even peeked in here, longer to even post, but I am so glad to have this available.
Barbara
He (she) who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance.
- Friedrich Nietzche -
I may never get to fly like the other girls, but I do so want to dance, so I continue to climb.
Can members please read: -
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post3029304
Then reply, we aren't having no special login, there will be no usernames like ramrod69, because names like that are deleted.... it should have been a simple enough question with simple yes or no answer and a reply, that's all.
Administrator
Missing my Libra babe Sherlyn, I hope she's rocking up there with the angels
Missing our Rianna, doesn't seem right, gone to early, hope she's partying with Sherlyn
I am confused about whether the need is for "consensus" or for a "vote" ? "consensus" is a process that involves discussion.
But if we are voting already, then my vote is "No, leave it open", and my reason is irrelevant.
I hope that we can keep the site open.
Yes, there is the risk that someone's anonymity would be broken, but I remember how desperately I searched for any kind of information about boys who wanted to be girls, or cross-dressers. I couldn't find anything in the library and what little I could find in the adult bookstore was so limited and in many cases fictional, that it was very depressing. The lack of information left me feeling so alone, so helpless, so hopeless. Between the ages of 15 and 26 I probably tried to kill myself at least 30 times, and even though I survived, I struggled. I was lucky enough to get access to usenet newsgroups when I was about 28, and eventually met some other transgenders, including the founders of the Tri-ESS group in Atlanta. Getting information from other transgenders, cross-dressers, and transsexuals helped me to realize that there was the hope, that even though I was a girl trapped in boy's body, that there were others like me who had found an equilibrium.
I know that there are tens of thousands, possibly millions, who are like I once was, alone, afraid, unable to comprehend the nature of their desires to dress, to be a woman. This domain provides a unique ability to create a resource available to all those who seek more information. To not only transvestites, cross-dressers, transgenders, and transsexuals, but also to their families, friends, spouses, and even their children. For some, this may be the first site they encounter, and this may be one of the best resources available to be able to collect a good understanding of the whole range of transgender behavior.
More importantly, we see in this group success stories, as well as questions and even members who have failed and rebounded.
If we need more "closed groups", that may make sense, but I hope that we could keep the core forums open as a resource for information to any who are so desperately wanting to understand cross-dressing and all it's variants.
I only joined after being able to read threads on the TS forum, and I can’t tell you how much it has helped me. Had I at the time been restricted to reading the CD section, it’s very doubtful I would have joined the site at all and been able to receive the help I’ve had.
Looking back to when I was young, there was no help available to someone like me – somewhere like here would have been a godsend for a naïve, confused and frightened teenager trying to understand who she was.
The world has changed with the internet, so help can be found if you look in the right place, but, if that place to find help isn’t available because it’s effectively a ‘closed shop’ where do you go.
If you identify as a TS, the probability is that you find somewhere else to get that help, so it may stop potential new members joining.
I would ask the question – “Why is it Open in the First Place’. Is the answer not to help the TS out there who doesn’t know where to get help.
Would it not be a case of blocking or preventing a TS from receiving what may well be much needed help. How many existing members might not have joined. The ongoing success and viability of sites is not just the current members, but that of future members.
I tend to post in Safe Haven or other private areas, partly due to privacy reasons but mainly because much of what I write is very personal, so I don’t post it in the open forums. That’s my choice and too be honest it if access was changed, it would probably make little difference to me.
That said, i have threads in the open forum, that I would happily like to have access restricted on.
But, all in all, I would suggest leaving as it is.
All the sections which you have access to show up in the 'new posts' section. They will still be there, don't worry!
IMO it is important for nonmembers to be able to see posts. That ability is what made me decide to join. If privacy is a concern, is it possible (without too much redesign work) to have pictures and avatars in the public furum are hidden until someone logs in?
As Tamara has already said more than once, we are not talking about closing the site or anything like it. We are talking about wherher people should have to be members before they read the posts in the transsexual forum
All the sections about cross-dressing and it's variants would remain as open under this proposition as they were before.
What we are talking about here has nothing to do with variants on cross-dressing and everything to do with the lives of transsexuals. A number of people no longer feel safe with the TS forum remaining open to the whole wide world.
The proposition, for which I have already expressed support, is for that forum to be readable only by those who log in to the main site - in much the same way as Loved Ones is currently.
As I have already said, I would not benefit personally, but it would help others so I am in favour.
Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.
This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist :facepalm:
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
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