How much the perception of the world changed when you discovered you were a trans/CD?

[Ryan A.]

Of all the things I have learned from this is to keep asking your-self the hard questions and to be honest with your answers to your-self.

This is something I do everytime with myself. I'm always asking myself to understand more and more about me.

It's curious to see your perception as noticing that something was different when you were younger. When I was a kid, I remember dreaming to have a moment like Mulan from Disney: be obligated (yes!) to dress as a boy and live some moments of life as one. I didn't understand why I wanted so bad to dress as a boy (but never letting leave the girl inside of me). This is the first moment that I remember as a "CD-memory".

Good question. I started to feel more confident and stronger once everything started clicking. When I thought of myself as female, I had always felt like a potential victim of men, because some men treat women badly, and alot of them think women are inferior. Now I know I dont have to stand for that any more than any other guy would. I also love being a gentleman, opening doors, offering seats to ladies etc. Its really cool. :D

What a deja-vu reading your post! I had thoughts like that when I was in-between 16 and 19, a time of my life that I hated men, because I felt I was victim of the gender-system of society (I felt inferior of men). I stopped hating men when I went to theraphy at 19 and discovered feminism. Feminism made me free of the gender-obligation of being a woman, also made me start asking those hard questions (that mistunderstood wrote).

It's interesting you said about being gentleman. I don't see "gentleman stuff" as a gentleman stuff, I love to do it as a woman. But I only start doing when I became stronger inside and stopped feeling feared of man (I'm not saying is your case - it's just my own experience). I still don't looove being a women, but I like it. But I can say that I love being bigender :D

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Oh another thing I could say that changed my perception of the world: human hair. I remember crying as a teenager 'cause I felt obligated to shave (and I didn't wanted to do that all the time). When I discovered feminism and started noticing my male side, I stopped shaving that much. I realised I could still feel feminine AND masculine shaving 2 times in a month. Now I don't think a hairy-woman is groos and a shaved-man is weird.