Aces and eights. Sometimes the only thing you can do is play the cards that you have been dealt. It's doing the best with what you've got.
Forgiveness is like a release. It allows you to get out from under carrying all that STUFF around. It takes a lot of energy to haul around things that are not really necessary to your life.
By most accounts, I am a fairly calm, even tempered people. But, in the past there were a few people that I ABSOLUTLY DESPISED. If I happened to think of them or saw something that reminded me of them, my stomach just knotted. Eventually I came to realize that it cost me a lot of effort to stay focused in that place. And, it would be a lot easier if you could contain anger and hatred, but you can't. It spills over into other parts of your life and just makes a f+++ed up mess.