Oh I think it's OK to have labels. They are obviously useful in bringing about social change and they are also useful for processing the large amounts of information that we all experience day to day. They don't have to be perfectly individually accurate. I mean I know we are all snowflakes and all different from each other but it's OK to use the shorthand of labels if you don't want to bore someone silly with your entire life history and your many, many opinions about yourself. So using the shorthand I am non binary transgender. I am not cross dressing because I am presenting the gender I am, which is somewhere between male and female. My manner, dress, gestures, outlook, etc., etc., are somewhere between the gender stereotypes of the macho man and the feminine woman. You want to be more specific, go for it. You want to have special pronouns because you actually identify your gender with the droids in Star Wars, go for it. I will do my best to remember the way in which you want to be referred. If it makes you happy to be thought of as the gender of forest faerie, I'm down with that and I will refer to you as fae. What's the big deal? We own our own vocabulary. It's just good manners to use the vocabulary the person I address requests. If a woman requests I call her Ms, but not Miss., OK. If a man says he is actually they, OK. However does this harm me? You can call me anything, btw. I don't care. I know who I am and I don't need you to confirm it. But if you do, let me do you that favor. I am happy to make my mind work just a little bit harder, any time at all.
