Wow, what a response, and so varied in the answers too. I will not beat myself up over this, and I don't feel bad after reading some of the replies. I appreciate that everyone has their viewpoint and respect that.

Over the years I've not given much thought to the wedding ring when out and about as Polly, as I used to. It's not particularly masculine, in fact we have identical rings so it could well pass in either mode. I've worn other items of jewellery and bought the new rings on a whim, because I liked how they looked and wanted to see how they looked on me. It was taking the wedding ring off to try them on that upset me, and I still can't explain it properly.

Yes, I have an immense bond with my wife, she knows about Polly and has even been out with me in that mode. Sadly, due to illness, I don't get out much so it's not an issue of passing any more. This is just for me, in the house. It may only be for a couple of hours and then the proper ring would go back on. Very rare I get the chance to stay dressed much longer. I've tried the engagement ring with the wedding band, they simply do not fit together. I have an indentation where the ring goes, if I leave it there the engagement ring is too tight. Same in reverse.

I should have a talk with her and get her opinion, and I will tell her how upset I got. I've no doubt she'll just brush it off, she knows how we are together and I had no intention of ending the marriage or anything. I can understand where a lot of you are coming from and it is a deep rooted thing with some. I saw a nice looking ring and bought it, I have it on now, seeing if it still upsets me. No, it does not. I know my wife and she knows me, we'll talk about this and sort it out.

But, interesting topic and some really strong feelings being shown, in both directions. Your comments have helped me come to terms with this and I'll let you know what my wife says.