That's it! I'll get to the thread topic in a moment, but this is the answer to the CDers who often say in this forum that it's not fair that women can be masculine, but men can't be feminine without being judged. Women ARE judged just as severely when they show cues that are commonly associated with males and facial hair is an excellent example of this. I just finished looking at cosmetic procedure statistics in another thread and there are indeed many women who get their facial hair removed.Originally Posted by Eryn
OK … back to the topic at hand. There do seem to be two major camps here, those who know they don't pass so they are satisfied with presenting the best they can as males presenting as females (what else can they do?), and those who wish to and feel they pass as women.
It's debatable whether people in the mainstream do read the members of the second camp. I tend to think that most do when they take the time to look closely and especially if there is personal interaction. The reason I say this is that TSs who have been on hormones for years go ahead with FFS. If they weren't read (and these are people who live full time, have had electrolysis, have their own hair and nails, and of course are on HRT), I dare say that FFS would not be necessary.
Age comes into play here as well. I think it is easier for both a young person and an older person to pass, but less so for someone in between (generally), unless they've won the TG genetic lottery. Obviously younger males haven't had their features fully altered yet by the continuing effect of testosterone that comes with age, but older males tend to be subconsciously compared to older females who have lost estrogen (people do sort and classify others according to age brackets among other things) so the playing field is more level; there is less contrast between a 60s-ish+ male and female than there is when they are both in their 30s or 40s (generally).
So the question - does it really matter if a TG is obviously or less obviously male? I think to the general public it doesn't matter. Most will lump everyone in the same boat, simply because their knowledge of gender diversity is so limited. But, the way they look at it will vary. Some will be judgmental, some will be mildly accepting although they will have the NIMBY attitude, a few will champion the TG for having the courage to be herself, and some will shrug their shoulders and move on. But it is true that the vast majority will keep their opinions to themselves at least in the presence of the TG (I'm reminded of Isha's mall experiment), except of course the people who have something positive to say.
This was difficult for my SO to come to terms with. She did realize eventually that the people she interacted with directly knew that she was not a GG and for many years before this, she would not have gone out without the certainty that she was not being read. But, knowing this now does not deter her from self-expression.
