Teresa, you already know that you need to do what is right for YOU and your wife needs to do what is right for HER. You (and I by the way) cannot continue to "own" other's problems.
So - Do it. Do what is right for you.
Dress to your own satisfaction. Your wife will likely be upset. Remember: those are HER feelings and SHE will have to do what is right for HER.
Accept that there may be marital problems that are greater than those you already have, but they are problems that can be fixed. Your GD cannot be fixed and will certainly trouble you until you die.
Best wishes
MsVal
