what defines being 'gay'

[Pat]

As for gay being to do with political persuasion, where did that come from?

As I said, it's a personal definition. In the general society at the moment gay and homosexual are considered synonyms, but I know people who are homosexual that I would not personally consider gay. Gayness (to me) carries with it the "gay culture" which includes its own political correctness and its own set of expected behaviors, its own set of shameful behaviors as well. That's what makes me compare them to a political affiliation -- because there are a whole host of behaviors outside of sexual behavior that are implied by the term gay. You don't have to agree.

The only way to KNOW if you're gay, is to sleep with a man and see if you like it.

I'm pretty sure many gay people (and, yes, I'm dropping back into the gay=homosexual definition) have known they were gay before they ever had a sexual experience. Just as most heterosexuals know they're hetero before they ever have a sexual experience.