Today it’s not uncommon for most high schools to have at least one or two transgender students. More parents are accepting and supportive. Do you think young cross dressers today will be incorrectly encouraged to transition? When I was this age the idea of becoming a girl was appealing to me. I could have been easily led in that direction.
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Nope. TS teens know they are TS, and will (eventually) seek help. Crossdressing teens will stay in the closet. NOBODY can encourage someone to transition. Yes, the fantasy of being a girl was appealing, but you could not have been forced, coerced, or persuaded unless you were TS. It is time for people to realize that transition is not the evolution of crossdressing.
I am not sure. But transitioning often comes with some serious medical interventions (and most physicians will not offer them with some serious thought).
I think that a lot of them will have access to better mental health professionals that we did. 40 years ago, there were virtually zero psychologists with any experience in gender issues outside of a few major city's universities, and CD, TG/TS was still considered so rare that they didn't even discuss the problems connected with it in texts, if at all.
What I think will happen, is that as it becomes more commonly seen by the mental health community, you will have more therapists who are less specialized in it treating patients, and some will eventually be incorrectly steered into the wrong path, perhaps due to the current practice of treating everything with pills because actually talking to the patients takes too much time which costs the insurance companies too much. They'd rather just dispence HRT than pay for years of discussion sessions.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I agree with Paula. I hate to generalize too much from my own experience, since there are many differences between us all. But still, when I think back to my teen years of crossdressing, I remember vivid fantasies (okay, I admit it, I still have those fantasies) of having a genuine female body, and enjoying that femininity. But it was always totally clear to me that those were just fantasies. I never would have been receptive to any suggestion that I really was inherently a girl, or that I should change my body. And my male parts gave me way too much enjoyment for me to seriously consider giving them up. While there are some unprofessional "professionals" out there (doctors, therapists, etc), and some kids are genuinely confused about their sexual identities, I think there are enough safeguards in the system to make it unlikely that more openness and acceptance (which is a good thing) would result in erroneous transitions (which, of course, would be a terrible thing).
First, I think you are grossly exaggerating the number of trans kids. "...not uncommon for most high schools to have at least one or two transgender students..." is WAY off. It would be extraordinary if "one or two" kids in the >36K US high schools (public and private) were out.
Secondly, about getting pushed in the wrong direction, not a chance. Cross dressers cross dress, they don't transition. Transpeople sometimes transition.
I"m with Paula on this, I think it's a flat-out "nope." I'm kind of assuming you're talking "transition" in terms of getting to SRS because pretty much at any point up to that, you can back away. There are too many in-between steps to inadvertently get to SRS (at least at present.) What I do think will happen is more and more people will be exposed to the concept of being transgender and the idea of being non-binary and there might well be a few people who stumble into it looking for themselves but come away with a better understanding which can only be beneficial to society as a whole.
I am not a woman; I don't want to be a woman; I don't want to be mistaken for a woman.
I am not a man; I don't want to be a man; I don't want to be mistaken for a man.
I am a transgender person. And I'm still figuring out what that means.
Some interesting thoughts here. As far as the thought of having 1 or 2 transgender kids in a school, I can see that, but it is very dependent on school size. I am working with mothers and GSA/QSAs (Gay/Queer Straight Alliances) and see many transgender kids in my area. One or two per school is hard to say without a specific count per school, but I do feel kids are out more than lets say those over the age of 50. If we are 0.6% of the population (I think this is understated), then it takes a school size of about 333 to have two. Now how many are out is quite debatable. I do know that there are plenty of transgender high school youth in my area to where we have to have appropriate discussions. Just the participation in GSAs/QSAs and other organized youth groups show that the numbers do exist in some significant quantity.
Anyway, if handled under current thinking, the risk is low. A young person who states they are transgender should be placed on puberty blockers after appropriate therapy. As they reach adulthood, they should then go on cross sex hormones if nothing has changed, or if they realize they are a cross dresser, the blockers are stopped and puberty moves forward as normal. I would suspect someone who is a crossdresser that is placed on blockers will feel out of place quickly as their classmates realize secondary sexual characteristics while they themselves are still undergoing no changes. A transexual will be glad they aren't changing. So the process could be vetting by itself.
One or two? I know one that has 60, they're all being encouraged to transition. They get them together in a group, imagine the peer pressure. There's a huge push for it, which is horrible really, many people I'm aware of through the internet have chosen to detransition or simply halt what they're doing for a variety of obvious reasons. This is what happens when adults, forms of media and essentially the internet almost in general begin to influence the minds of children and young people. Children are becoming aware that they'll be hailed as brave and special people for transitioning, for taking hormones and undergoing surgery, the impression is it's a heroic and pioneering feat to either be transgender, or gay or whatever. The whole glorification and propagation of the LGBT movement is literally psychotic, it's poisonous to society.
When I was younger especially I fully wanted to be a girl too. I am this so called transgender. Thankfully no one got their hands on my mushy little mind back then.
I believe it depends on the counselor at the school. From what I have read the majority of younger children seem to go through a phase and 'out grow' desires to be a child of the opposite sex. Don't jump on me if I have not chosen the right words. First you have to figure out why the child wanted to be the opposite sex. What was the allure? What was the biological, spiritual or nurturing cause. Past elementary school it appears there is going to be some children who are transgender or homosexual who need counseling.
I have a friend whose grandson is totally confused to his sexual identity. Within the past two years he has come out as transgender. Or gay. He is in flux. He cannot figure it out. At least in the high school he attended there seemed to be an air of affirming his transgender tendency to at least act if not transition to becoming a woman. Among the student population he has lost his male friends. Males shun him like the plague. Many of the girls think he is a cool novelty. For someone who maybe lacks maturity, does it means if you like to wear women's clothing, you must be gay. I know society thinks it has made a lot of strides toward helping kids figure all this out, but, the truth seems to be the kids are still as confused as when I was a teen in the 1960's. I thought I must be gay because I liked to wear women's clothing. That's what society said. Now? It seems the kids are for the most part still uneducated. When a person is truly confused and uneducated it is totally possible to lead someone in one direction over another. This is not limited to the question on this thread.
I don't think so.For the most part Crossdressers will alway be just crossdressers.
Angie
Paula,
The younger generation have more information available and the choices are easier to make because there is usually someone prepared to help and advise . In my day CDing and the implications were taboo subjects, it's something a school boy might sneak off and do in his bedroom with his mother's or sister's clothes. Now we know there's far more to it than that, finding out it's for life the modern generation will have better informed choices.
That may also be a problem , being over saturated with information can also cause confusion, we only have to look at the labels used on the forum to see how confusing it can be at times.
Recent press reports in the UK show a two or three fold increase in attendances at gender clinics, one reported having 150 under tens waiting for counselling.
I still find that very hard to believe or understand, how many of us would have understood gender and sexual issues below the age of ten, I certainly didn't, so why is there an almost alarming increase, are they being misdirected by parents , teachers or society ?
I hope the current system isn't changed too much , I know to some it's a long hard road but with it comes safeguards, in the UK the NHS has limited funds they have to know people who do want to transition are genuine, it's not something that is going to happen overnight on a whim.
Personally testosterone kicked in early so it was interest in girls from an early age, the whole thing became confused when dressing , girls and sex became intertwined leaving me with GD and being bi-gender.
There are a lot more then you think. Even in Idaho I know of quite a few kids who have transitioned in their schools. Boise, hailey, Idaho falls, twin falls all have them. Just kept quiet for everyone's sake.Originally Posted by Jenniferathome
I don't know if this is real or pure sarcasm I'm leaning toward sarcasm. Why? Because most everything in that post is either conjecture or straight misinformation. Otherwise known as BS and really not helpful. I strongly suggest that whoever reads that post do some REAL research and vetting. (like the number of people who have "detransitioned"...it is a VERY very small number)
To the OP, there are so many checks and gates that no one is encouraged to transition. However, with today's ability to counsel and help, there will be less suicides and feeling like you are alone in the world. This cannot be a bad thing.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
Jennifer at home- every teenager I know, knows at least one trans person. One or two per highschool sounds dead on.
The OT, and my post were about crossdressing kids being pushed into transition, not about number of TS kids.
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That's a really nasty, untrue, and ( mods, are we allowed to say 'full of crap'?) post.
You don't believe me about the numbers Lorileah? I can't prove them to you but I heard it from a parent whose children attend the high school. How are you going to research the number of people who have detransitioned, I highly doubt there are proper statistics. Rather than doubt the thought that people have second thoughts or change their minds you would rather deny it like you want to convince anyone reading. There are just as many suicides too, it's wishful thinking to believe otherwise, transitioning and sexual reassignment aren't miracle cures.
No one is encouraged to transition? Do you actually believe that, they're certainly not discouraged you know. Checks and gates as well, how many do they turn away, we know the numbers have at least doubled and tripled.
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How is it untrue Paula, maybe what you think is nasty and untrue BS? Ever considered that?
Last edited by Alexa CD; 08-14-2016 at 10:43 PM.
There may be more than you think. My daughter is under 10 and her basketball team has a child born as a girl presenting as a boy, and another who girl who has a brother that was born a girl. I could see the possibility that a child that young could get pushed in a direction before they have truly formed opinions of gender and sexuality. I would hope they don't get pushed in any direction and find their own way in an accepting environment, but I think the possibility exists.
@Alexa CD - there is no possible way to coerce gender variant kids into transition. The bullying and stigma they face in schools *all* schools, pretty well insures only the most desperate come out. Your claim of 60 out kids is *really* hard to believe. The largest high school in America is the Brooklyn Technical High School in NY, with 8076 students. My fiancé is a police sergeant here in Dallas, and one of his schools is Skyline #12 in the nation, with 4697 students. I don't know what it's like in the Brooklyn Technical High School, but I can tell you at Skyline there are only a handful of trans kids. And for good reason - being in Skyline is a risky proposition, even if you aren't transgender. So for a school to have that many trans kids, well, it would need to be a pretty huge school. Using the BATHROOM is a hardship for trans students in many places. I can't speak for other places, but I am actively involved with this here in Texas, and I can tell you we don't have a school with 60 out trans kids - no freaking way. And I can also tell you that even with the more tolerant attitudes of many youth, there are enough hateful bigoted little troglodytes who'll make sure the trans kids get the crap kicked out of them.
So I apologize, but based on firsthand knowledge and experience as an activist in this area, your claims seem specious to me.
As for people who detransition, yeah that happens. It's relatively small, and it generally happens early on, either because:
- they lack resources and fail to launch
- they are on HRT for a while, and realize this isn't the right path for them
The first one is pretty sad, but usually they end up trying again later. I see a fair number of these, I don't see this as "it was wrong for them", just that the barrier to entry is still too high. The second group is what most people think of when they think of detransition, and out of the VERY LARGE number of trans people I know, I know four who've detransitioned, two MtF, two FtM. One of the MtF's, it just wasn't right for them. The other MtF dropped out for a woman. She'll be back. Both of the FtM's tried to transition, and realized they simply weren't transgender. It's a really low percentage though, I can tell you that. Nobody had surgery. (LOL, people who desperately need surgery can't get it here - it's not like they perform them at the Minute Clinic!)
As for gatekeeping, the only medical trans youth program in Texas is quite gatekeepery, and looks for kids who are persistent, insistent, and clearly binary before putting them on blockers - which are reversible. It's probably TOO gatekeepery, really. Because at a young age, I knew who I was. And look, here I am now. The kids who transition face enormous obstacles. They generally know what they are doing. The transtrenders are unlikely to come out, and sure as hell are unlikely to transition. They may talk about it, but talk is cheap.
The number of us have increased because the barrier to entry has lowered - there is still massive pressure to not come out, to not transition. I can't believe I am even having this discussion with a faceless, closeted CD, but here I am. Hey - if the barriers to entry are so low, why aren't you showing your face in your profile picture, sweetie? Oh right, the adults who'd make your life a living hell don't exist for kids. Oh puh-lease!
I'm sorry that you are trying to talk yourself out of whatever it is you are trying to talk yourself out of with all this stuff you are saying. Or rather that you are pretty obviously trying to talk yourself INTO staying closeted. And it's fine for you to do whatever it is you are doing with your life. It's your life and you should live it as you see fit. But I'm telling you that the figures you quote on desistence, post transition suicide, etc. are wrong, and the issues trans people face who DO end their lives well into transition are social in nature. Transition, at least for binary trans people, generally works GREAT. If only society didn't treat us like we were sub-human.
BTW, I believe a large number of older trans people who regret their decisions (and there aren't many of these) are likely non-binary and were shoe-horned into a binary gender by a system that only allowed for "male" and "female."
Arg . . . I heard from a friend of a friend who's brothers' dog said . . . blah, blah, blah. :facepalm: Yes . . . the media is chock o block full of rampant forced transitions of minors stories. Seriously?????
This BS just panders to transphobia . . . very nice.
Last edited by Marcelle; 08-15-2016 at 06:13 AM.
But yet you are here as a CD still trying /dressing up somehow trying to be / look like girl after all these years later........
Amazing to me that you feel so bitter towards those that were brave enough to forge ahead and become themselves.
Your rather hurtful comments about the LGBT sicken me........why the hate ? You must have some legacy issues that you did not mention to carry this kind of hatred towards a group of people who have been discriminated against for years.
Last edited by Lauri K; 08-15-2016 at 08:37 AM.
Way too Girly !I couldn't smell the smoke, and now I'll watch the flames
Out on Parole ......Woo Hoo
Arguing with someone with so much hatred for trans people is rather pointless. Alexa CD will always hate, and keep dreaming up fantasies of children being duped into something they don't want to justify her hate. Remember when Anita Bryant had fantasies that homosexuals were recruiting children? Same thing.
Alexa, as someone who works in the community almost daily and works with youth when possible (GSAs/QSAs/Youth Counseling/Mama Dragons (a group of fiercely protective mothers)), I will agree with everything Paula has stated. I think things are better for our youth then they were for us because of other youth that accept them is in greater quantities (notice I am not saying all youth). It makes things safer than what we had, but not near totally safe. And to say you know 60 that are being encouraged to transition, then going "well I heard it from this other person..." takes any validity away. I get you may have thought you were a girl when you were young and you know better now. Good for you! I hope everyone gets to figure it out. As everyone has stated above, there is plenty of gatekeeping and social aspects that prevent false transitions. I only know of two in my community and they were both adults. One has mental health issues and disappeared right after detransitioning, so I haven't been able to talk to her. The other detransitioned because of all the judgment and then took her life shortly after. It just doesn't happen often.
I like seeing someone else say this. Non-binary, older trans individuals aren't very common. I have always thought that it was three parts. One being Paula's comment. Another being awareness as a lot of us just didn't hear of non-binary and may shoot for what we know (think of not knowing about transgender identities until the internet). The last being that I can see someone bottling it up for so long that you jump to the other side thinking the other binary must be it because you have denied yourself for so long, you want to fill in the gap by experiencing it 100%. Basically an effort to fill the huge void.
First, we need a definition of "transition". Are we talking about living as the other sex or are we talking about having the surgery to become the other sex? Up until the point of surgery, it's possible to revert to one's original sex.
I'm not sure "encouraged" is the correct word, but it's easier and more acceptable for boys to live as girls and vice versa than it was many years ago. It's also a way for children (and their parents) to get attention. Or even money as in filing lawsuits against school districts.
I know of one (there are probably others) major state university that offers sex change surgery with their student health insurance. This means that for the cost od a college degree, a student can get a degree and go in as a boy and come out as a girl (or vice versa).
So, in general, I agree with Paula_56
If there is anything poisonous to society on this planet, its the ongoing 'glorification and propagation' of the heterosexual 'only the family values between men and women' and 'men are men and women are women' lifestyle thats been happening for as long as the media exists. And it doesnt even matter if its based on what someone is thought or believes for other reasons, that ongoing 'glorification and propagation' is whats used as an excuse for violence against LGBTQ people and to deny them basic human rights. Why? Because that narrative doesnt allow for anyone to be 'different'. And before you start on a rant about how i'm wrong....look at the tv, read a paper, whatever...its everywhere.
Last edited by Marissa V; 08-15-2016 at 09:18 AM.
You can't fly with the eagles if you sleep with the pigeons.
I'm serious Marcelle these people aren't gossiping, one is a nurse, the other is a dentist. This is the reality, in my city there are now at least 3000 school age transgender children. There was a story about how they made a special bathroom for a 6 year old. It really isn't an over exaggeration, why can nobody wrap their heads around this. If you tell every kid that's depressed, doesn't fit in or feels like they want to be the opposite sex that they're transgender, they're all going to believe it.
Lauri, what I'm saying is I would have been labelled and boxed as a child, if I had come out at 8 years old or whenever, that would have been it for me. I, my parents and whoever else would have known I was transgender and I would have fully believed it, I would have been told what I was. Instead I got over it (for the most part) and accepted myself, I can be my actual self and go on as a relatively normal, functioning male without any near crippling social or physical issues. Why be brave and amazing when I can be logical, I can do whatever I like as I am, I can have children for example. As far as the nauseating LGBT community goes I think I can dislike it all I like, it doesn't represent everyone and people should be allowed to disagree with it. I'm interested in a healthy productive society, I'm not selfish.
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Believe it or not Marissa but as far as I'm aware LGBTQ people have human rights, and nobody in any proper position of influence in the first world has called for, or excused violence against these people, or against us. I don't see any mainstream media outlets or TV shows ridiculing or putting transgender people for example in a bad light, the narrative is the opposite. The propagation and glorification of healthy, normal families values is not an issue, mothers and fathers is how it has to be. That's the way it has been and always should be. I don't think heterosexuals are poisonous to society.
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I appreciate the disdain PaulaQ. I disagree on a number of things and I think you've left out parts of your book which may be, for the most part, why. Something I find quite interesting is the language you use, and some of the things you say.
I'll give examples: "LOL, people who desperately need surgery can't get it here", implying what? "She'll be back", essentially insisting people belong somewhere. "barrier to entry", "gatekeeper", "closeted", making it a place, a separate thing, is part of the problem, you talk about it like opening a door instead of removing it, by recognising transgender as separate from everyone else makes it separate. Gays, with the exception of LGBT parades for example removed the door, and it worked, do you understand what I'm saying?
Also "sweetie", really?
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