Do you think I can be passable

[dolovewell]

Sorry that you had to experience that. But thanks for sharing your story, as a lot of people can learn from it.

To all of you, I just want to say that most people, even if they don't think you pass, will still refer to you as "ma'am" or "miss" or "lady" as a courtesy. They do it just to be nice, and to avoid confrontation. Just because people don't publicly out you, doesn't mean that you haven't been clocked. Children and teenagers are more comfortable with expressing their opinions in public, so they are the ones who are most likely to publicly say something when they clock you. But trust me, you've been clocked by many other strangers around you. You don't pass. It's almost impossible without medical intervention. So, as some of the veterans on these forums have shared, don't worry so much about passing. Instead, focus on being presentable, being happy, and being yourself. It is a much healthier approach.

I think that is the danger of online crossdressing communities.

This board skews older. So most of the ladies here are straight shooters and don't really care about passing, know its nearly impossible, and just say to not worry about it. Which is how it should be.

I have participated in crossdressing communities online where the audience skews much, much younger. Mostly young adults between the ages of 18-29. The userbase in those communities seem to be a lot more obsessed with passing. So when someone posts a pic of themselves and asks if they pass, and you tell them no, the rest of the userbase will get mad at you for being mean and hurtful. So they all tell the user she passes, when in reality, she doesn't, but they are just doing it to hugbox. I think that is toxic. Better to be honest with them upfront so they don't get crushed harder when they finally get clocked in public. It's not mean and hurtful to tell someone they don't pass, I think thats the right thing to do.

Unfortunately, I think younger crossdressing ladies care more about validation and hearing what they want to hear, than hearing the truth. They post a pic of themselves asking if they pass, not to get honest feedback, but hoping they get a conga line of yes answers to get the validation they are desperately seeking. We live in an age of social media where women constantly post pictures of themselves on Facebook/Instagram to get likes and validation, and younger crossdressers are trying to get on that train themselves. It's dangerous.