A surprisingly difficult question, I think because I get confused about the idea of "cost." Did transitioning cost me? Or did spending 60 years pretending to be something I'm not cost me? I kind of think the fake life is where all the cost was borne for me -- the unhappiness, the bad health, the flight to risk-taking behaviors to buttress up the false personality, the total rejection of the person reflected in the mirror or depicted in the photograph. Now, I've actually stopped paying costs. I mean, yeah I'm spending some money but Shakespeare says, "Who steals my purse steals trash. 'Tis something, nothing: 'Twas mine, 'tis his, and has been slave to thousands. A good reputation is the most valuable thing we have—men and women alike." And that false identity actually stole my good reputation by making me pretend to be someone I wasn't; by making me lie to my friends and loved ones. I feel like I'm recovering that reputation now. I feel blessed to have the opportunity to do so and not to have died without my own kids having ever met me. Those were the costs -- I guess that means my transition was pre-paid.
