I agree Krisi.
I guess to some CDs its all a game or a quirky thing they do for entertainment and don't really understand how it is in real life.
I agree Krisi.
I guess to some CDs its all a game or a quirky thing they do for entertainment and don't really understand how it is in real life.
A lot of absolute opinions. "This would NEVER happen".
People are all different. We're a diverse bunch with many different feelings and motives. I personally wouldn't dismiss what I can't understand. Anything is possible.
No, can't say as I have.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Fran
It's worth something just being around to Fuss!
I think for some people they like to dress like a woman woman because it makes them feel more like a woman which is what they like. Take it a step further and they want to have sex like a woman so that means having it with a man. They probably take it further and only want the sexual position s the woman takes when they do this. All for the "feeling like a woman " experience. Just a guess on my part.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I'm in gender therapy. Latest pinpoint is that I am transgender but probably not binary. I've been attracted to men when dressed. If you subscribe to the concept of two spirited people, you could say I am both a straight man and a straight woman at the same time. Need an aspirin?
I really have no clue if I am binary non binary and I really don't care or feel I need a label.
Transgender female non transitional and a gay male all rolled into one.Just a mutt I guess.
No not really but I do hit on and it's fun. But that's it.
I'm inclined to agree with those that say you're either attracted to men or you're not. Perhaps your fantasizing or curious, and that's fine, but that's not the same as being attracted to males. Perhaps the dressing has let you bring out feelings you have suppressed.
Perhaps if you had past experiences with men it would make you more aware of an attraction to men, or for that matter confirmed that you aren't attracted to them. I just don't think the clothes change what your basic attractions are.
I agree with doc here. I am not interested in men in any way. just because you dress, your sexual tendencies do not change. I have been hit on, which is somewhat weird for me, but i made it quite clear that i am not interested. I told my wife about being hit on and she laughed her head off.
[B][I]Call me Michelle: doll:
Perhaps the dressing allows an expression of female sexuality and not bi-ness? You could say many CDers dress to "feel like" women. Perhaps some of them also want to "feel like" women sexually? If so, I think that may be harder to define than just saying they're bi. My point is, it's not the clothes, but perhaps, it's an inner expression that the clothes help facilitate.
I think some need to remember they are men that dress in womens clothes you do not think like a woman, you have no idea what it feels like to be a woman and you never will more than likely. Claiming clothes cause you to think that way is not a rational thought process..
I am all for guys/girls CDing if you enjoy it and if it makes you feel more complete or if you are truly trans and need to make the outside match how you feel inside I get that.
I am not pointing fingers or making a broad generalization on any person or group just trying to make a point or reality that seems to never be mentioned here.
Last edited by Tracii G; 04-10-2018 at 01:48 AM.
That somehow dressing in women's clothes changes your sexual preferences baffles me. Sorry, but I don't think you're a "straight guy". I dress in some very feminine clothes much of the time....but I'm still not interested in men in the slightest.
What Doc said.
"Taking the time to be in touch with my feminine side"
I can see how dressing up as a woman, can change your sexual preferences. Put on a bunch of biker clothes, and we'd feel like a biker. Put on a football uniform with pads and a helmet, and we'd feel like a football player.
Clothes, especially womens clothes, have a magical affect on some. It does me. Of course, to want a man, only when your dressed like a woman, IMO, tells me your at least BI regardless of how your dressed. But you ONLY want to venture into that territory when you're dressed.
What ever floats our boats, right? Sometimes I takes a sail to get us motivated. Some of us have 4 inboard motors with turbo's.
Sorry, but I've been a biker and the clothes will not make you feel like a biker -- riding 10,000 miles a year makes you feel like a biker. I've played football and the clothes don't make you feel like a football player -- intense physical conditioning and hours and hours of practice drills and game days with full contact make you feel like a football player.
The current model of human sexuality is that sexual preference is inborn and immutable. Clothing won't change it. But if you have the identity to go along with those clothes and sexuality that will allow a male attraction, then dressing up might well give yourself permission to feel it when dressed.
I am not a woman; I don't want to be a woman; I don't want to be mistaken for a woman.
I am not a man; I don't want to be a man; I don't want to be mistaken for a man.
I am a transgender person. And I'm still figuring out what that means.
Whenever this topic recurs, I'm reminded, while reading through the responses, of Bubba listening to a group of astrophysicists discussing their area of expertise and thinking to himself, "I can't understand what they are talking about. They must be stupid." The problem is that many are trying force any expression of sexuality into the simplistic gay/bi/straight model and some things just don't fit so they they are reduced to invalidating the feelings they can't understand. The OP is as good an expression of autogynephilia (AGP) as you are going to get. AGP is neither gay, bi nor straight. When you understand AGP, you understand constructs like "bi when dressed," "male lesbian," and "I'm straight but...." AGP is proof that sexual orientation and gender identity are NOT separate things. Sexual orientation is not wholly inborn but can be shaped by things like imprinting and trauma. Once "set" it is most likely immutable. And yes I have experienced AGP in its various forms. One of my favorite AGP fantasies is of GGs with penises. Is that gay, bi or straight? I'm sooo confused. I dreamed that up when I was a teenager, long before I discovered futanaria. But my very first orgasm was from imagining myself dressed as a female having sex with dudes. What is important in that fantasy is not the dudes but the state of feminisation (emasculation.) If I were really gay or bi I would probably know it by now. In fact I would prefer being gay to AGP but since AGP is immutable, I'm stuck with it for the duration.
Hi Girls, love the subject.
I too am Hetro in drab.
But when I put on all of my Feminine Female finery, from Lingerie and Breast Forms to a cute wig, dress and heels, things change a bit.
I do not seek out male companionship, but IF the situation arose and he treated like a Girl, I can see myself being available.
I can identify some with Sometimes Miss, but not as deeply. Your terrible experiences as an abused child make me feel sick and sad. However, i had a father, who was deeply troubled, and he never wanted sons, my mom said. He wanted daughters only, but got one handicapped daughter, then twin sons, and four years later, me, who was not wanted. My dad tried to get an uncle to adopt me. I was at war with me dad much of my life, and never felt wanted. I know i did things that really hurt, him, too, and i tried to make up for that in his final six years, when i was helping care for him.. I am only attracted to certain type of women, and not attracted to men. BUT, when i get completely dolled up, to the nines, I do have strong feelings of wanting to be held and caressed by a man, but short of penetration. I actually met four different men over the years, but did not have penetration,. i di enjoy dancing around, modeling for them, letting them caress my legs, and "pretend" some. My dad always talked about being attracted, to tall, leggy women, and i was a tall, leggy son, with rather shapely legs. i always felt he might be admiring my legs. I believe a lot of my longings to be touched and caressed while dressed to the nines, comes from lack of love from my father. And it could also be that many gays and dressers and TS also had little love from their fathers. I am trying to overcome these strong feelings and urges, which can really get me into trouble, i do not need. The fantasies are usually far better, than the real acting them out! It can get one hurt, or killed. I am doing my own recovery work, and embracing my man side more, dressing far less, and dealing with painful deep issues. Meeting men as a woman is against my morals, too, and Higher Power. I did come to peace with my dad in his final several months, i believe, somewhat at least. Recovery from some things i s a lifetime thing.
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Yes, Amanda, I understand as I feel two spirited that way. Taken plenty of aspirin!
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Again, Amanda, is onto something. I always felt that being sexually attracted to women, made them afraid of me, and that women did not want sex , and disliked it. my sister never wanted a man , nor sex, nor kids. Many girls i tried to date, seemed to despise being wanted, so I felt like the male sex organ was hated by women! I found it myself being kind of effeminate and passive, as being aggressive turned women off to me! So, i find it easier to dress up, and enjoy men enjoying my photos dressed. Working on being more accepting of my maleness, and to be a gentle man women admire now, putting all the rejections behind me. I still get rejected most of the time, but i do have some women friends now. I still have to rid myself of "male shame", though. And society is down on maleness now bigtime, making it even tougher to win womens' trust.
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Well said LSS. I have the AGP thing.
With me it would not mater whether I was dressed or not, I have been with a few men and only once in anything Feminine, when I'm with a guy I get turned on and can't get enough of him, but once it is over I'm no longer interested in doing anything with him and it takes a few days before I can be with another man.
So I know I could never ever have a full on live in relationship with a guy, just not into men like that.
Give me a female partner full time any time, Just wish I could find one.
Sophie Mosley
Hmmm! I think we try to over simplify gender and sexuality. As I grew up learning from my sisters about clothes, dancing, and other girl things. I liked girls as a boy, but found dressing as one fun and wanted to be able to go to proms and dances as a girl. When I did go out on a date with a guy as a joke for a contest I enjoyed it. He made a few passes at me and I found out he was gay, but I wasn't interested we did remain friends, and went out often. I also went out with a few other guys where I played the girlfriend. While I found the flirtation fun and enjoyed hands trying to slide up my nylon covered legs as I sat in the middle of the seat. I was absolutely not interested in sex with any of them. My only interest in potential sexual partners have been female.
Forget the 50 shades thing, I honestly think the human sphere of thoughts and feelings, and especially when dealing with sexuality, are way to diverse to try and fit into three boxes.
So Thanx Stevie, this is some good stuff......guess i'm gonna have put my research cap (something akin to a dunce cap for me) back on.
I don't think it's "proof that the 2 are things are not separate", but I will give you the benefit of the doubt that there are more vagaries then we give credit for.
I, once in a conversation much like this one, said something to the effect that the less masculine a male gets the more he would register on my brain as sexually attractive (which is not saying that I would find one sexually stimulating as a possible partner for myself), much like a she-male porn star.
The whole forum nearly rioted, and it got very ugly..............so please don't come unglued folks, the terms are merely for the purpose of discussion. I'm trying to back up my narrative that nothing on this orb is as simple as we try to make it.
I also remember a long rambling post years ago, on another site, that talked about bisexuality (in gender normies), having more to do with people just being very sexual type of human beings, and for whatever reason, the sexual partners gender doesn't matter to them.
Which of course has little to do with the OP's topic, but I tend to agree with t as explaining why a person can go both ways.
IDK, I guess I must truly be non-binary because I don't think of myself as female gendered enough to need any possible validation that could come from a biological male with matching gender.
But as I once said in the TG/NB forum, I think masculine men are sometimes rather sad and pathetic beings, not much appealing in that.
But that's just me, I sincerely hope your ymmv.
By the way Stevie, I laughed my butt off on the Bubba and astrophysicist analogy; i always did like your sense of humor.
Cass
Last edited by Cassandra Lynn; 04-10-2018 at 10:57 PM.
Maybe you are attracted to men but it just surfaces when you are dressed as a woman. -- or -- You aren't attracted to men, but you are attracted to (excited by) the idea that a man is attracted to you when you are dressed up. That's a fantasy that's pretty common among us, and is rarely played out in reality. When it is made real, you find out if your attraction to men is real or fantasy.
I never had the need to test it in reality. I know it's just fantasy (one of many).
I can describe in detail the physical appearance of a woman in my fantasies. I cannot do that for a man, as there is nothing about a man, no physical appearance attribute, that I am attracted to. So my fantasies are about me, a man is just a nameless, faceless prop.