FWIW - My one incident I can contribute to the discussion...
I once went out en-femme with a GG friend to a gay/trans friendly bar.
While we were there, this guy came up and started flirting with the two of us.
To my surprise, I was flattered and intrigued. I honestly thought I could actually accept a date with him
- BUT -
all too quickly he let me know that he didn't see me as a woman, or as a (cliche warning here!) woman stuck in a man's body (I warned you!). It was obvious that he saw me as a man in drag. He was all to eager to inform me that he was BI and that he was still interested - dropping the 'drag queen' label what seemed like a thousand times.
Well, that was enough to turn me off and ruin the whole event.
If he could have seen the female in me and responded to that, we might have found way forward. As 'a girl' I was interested, but I had ZERO interest in a male to male relationship.
And for the record, at the time, I was in therapy, on hormones, and thought I was transition and surgery bound. (all that changed later)
So - what does that make me? the closest I've been able to come was "hetero curious" when I was working on switching genders
