Question; Do You Love To Cross-Dress or feel it's an affliction?
Pros and cons.
I am so addicted to dressing, I love dressing fully and shopping for dresses.
I hate when I feel shame.
I feel sad that my wife thinks dressing is all messed up!
Question; Do You Love To Cross-Dress or feel it's an affliction?
Pros and cons.
I am so addicted to dressing, I love dressing fully and shopping for dresses.
I hate when I feel shame.
I feel sad that my wife thinks dressing is all messed up!
"This is ME" I am not CRAZY, I'm just a GUY who likes dresses!
Since allot of men dress up in woman's clothing that makes it a manly thing to do!
Much more fun than fishing.
I do construction like house building and I love CD-ing, what's the difference?
It’s neither. It’s part of who I am that I’ve learned to accept..
Right now I love it. It's infiltrated my brain LOL. I don't feel shame from it, because from my current point of view I'm not doing anything shameful. I know eventually my brain will swtich gears and I'll see it in a different light.
To be rigorously honest, for me it has been an affliction, and i wish i had not been born with it, or wish i had never been born, period, because of it, and other very life and death mental health issues i have, and toxic, bullying family i came from. My dad had no business getting married, and my mom married him, because she felt sorry for him! My dad never wanted sons, and got a severely handicapped daughter who hates men, and three sons after that. One older brother is in prison yet. Criminal minds. i was bullied and picked on all my school years, and at home. Then at age 13, sneaked into my sister and mom's things. Was sexual for the first time, then. Quit out of shame, then was in the service, then occasionally bought hose thru the mail. At age 50, really got into dressing full bore, but it is against the religion i was called into in 1980. I have paranoia, some schizo, and depression and bi polar. Dressing made me feel like the tall, gorgeous women i adored, but could never have. Only short fat girls liked me. I have dated in my 30's and a little in my 40's, but nothing much a all since. Women were very turned off by finding i dressed. It has isolated me even more than i was, and that is not good. Guilt and shame stalk me, so i seldom dress now, but when i do , it is too look classy and sexy. I need to be more social and out of myself, and have more confidence as a man . It would have been nice to never have this additional luggage to bear.
Nope, not at all...…….
af·flic·tion
[əˈflikSH(ə)n]
NOUN
something that causes pain or suffering.
"a crippling affliction of the nervous system"
synonyms: disorder · disease · malady · complaint · ailment · illness · indisposition · scourge · plague · trouble · menace · evil · visitation
To pick a couple of words out of those synonyms: Yes, there was much of my life I can complain about, and I wish I could do over because my gender variance caused trouble. Acceptance of it has allowed me to see it much differently though.
All the bad stuff, the shame, guilt and anguish, was an unfortunate step in the journey. I'm cured of all that if I continue to live in acceptance and live as closely to my authentic self as I can.
Cass
Alice to me it sounds like dressing is the least of your problems. Whats wrong with short fat girls? Anyway, lots of people have all these problems, and instead of cross dressing they have some other obsession. As far as the religion you were called into in the 1980... Look what the silent majority bought with their morality. I certainly don't need their hypocrisy and neither do you.
I agree with Katrina. Dressing is just part of me. I can't deny it and I'm faced to live with it for the rest of my life.
Good question...........I at times feel as if it's an affliction but as I age I have grown into the attitude it's just who I am..........for me it's a constant struggle as I like the MAN I am but also love the woman I can be.....if that makes any sense...........
Judy in a word, yes I’ve come to believe it is somewhat of an affliction. The issue we all have as crossdressers or trans folks
is what do we do with it. Do we choose to live with it try to find a way to manage it, say through HRT and other such things
or do we simply find a way to let it not rule our lives. It’s most difficult in whatever we choose in this life of ours and as I tell
people I would not wish being trans on my worst enemy. I do yes believe you are born this way our choice as in anything in
life is what do we do with it then
I do love to crossdress. Can't see why I would do it if I didn't.
The only affliction is the anxiety that comes from not accepting yourself.
It took me over 12 years to get over the guilt.
But, what a wild ride the last 8 have been for Sherry and I!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
It's both for me, After all it is a Guilty pleasure.
Like a German Shepard digging into the trash while the family is away, it feels so good to be bad.
But if i had to choose, I'd say I love it more than think it's an affliction. I only think it's an affliction because of my perceptions of how girls will think of it in the hypothetical situation that I'm dating someone.
My personal belief is that it's just clothes and people put too much meaning behind things, myself included.
The moment i escape this belief of "CDing means i'm damaged, gay, gross, disgusting" I will be free.
I always wondered what life would be like if i had friends who knew me 100%, that there wasn't a single detail that i could think up that they wouldn't know.
It's not an affliction for me. It is a part of my life.
I love crossdressing and enjoy every aspect of it. Though I am not 'out' due to priorities in my life (I want to be recognised for other stuff), I am not remotely ashamed of it. I do not with I wasn't a crossdresser but occasionally wish I had not spent so much on dresses.
Judy, I don't feel it's an affliction. Perhaps as a younger person when I did not understand and accept myself I saw it that way. But being older, not caring what others think, and having an accepting wife just has me accepting crossdressing.
Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".
Judy,
I love what crossdressing give me , it satifies that inner need , the clothes are the outward sign to the World how I truly feel inside . The feeling of an affliction came and went years ago , I guess when I nearly ended my life through it , I do recall going through a period of asking why me and hoping it would go away , that was mostly about fear of acceptance from others . Fully accepting yourself makes that fear ebb away , it's their problem not yours !
I believe your addiction is because you can't achieve a balance , you have to fight for your freedom to express yourself ! When you get those precious moments to do it you want it all knowing you can't because within a few short hours it all goes back into it's hiding place and Judy ceases to exist again. I have a balance now because Teresa is out in the open , I can freely chose when and how much I dress . If I have a function coming up or there's a change in the weather well I just jump in the car and buy what I need , knowing I can come back home and hang it in my wardrobe without worrying about anyone seeing it . Maybe shopping can become the addiction because being dressed as a woman gives us so many choices , it is wonderful just to be able to go out and integrate into society, again that can be addictive but comes with a sting in the tail because we don't know how far that need will take us .
Last edited by Teresa; 07-29-2018 at 05:38 AM.
I love to crossdress largely as a hobby; clothes and shoes, forms, some jewellery. It is comfort and joy more than an affliction although I do still feel guilt for it. My wife knows of my hobby, accepts that I enjoy it but takes no part. She does not make me feel bad for it at all but wishes neither to see it nor help with it.
This arrangement is quite good overall, of course, but the yearning for her to simply allow me to dress in her prescence sometimes is part of the feelings of affliction.
It is a "affection" based on society. And redtea said 'it's just clothes", but do girls think that it is just clothes, I believe not. And if it is just clothes, how come they are sooooo important and special to all of us? We do not fit in society, I have even heard gay individual's having a distasteful attitudes for crossdressers, how ironic is that? (Sorry, maybe a little off subject)
I always loved the way it makes me feel, I got over the guilt of dressing a few years ago, the only guilt left is what it could do to the people I love.
Some of my gay friends think CDing is silly and down right dumb.
I explain the trans thing and they just don't get it and think I'm a little odd.
I have no shame or guilt about dressing its just how I balance my internal and external me.
Rachel,
You are so right , if it was just wearing the clothes I wouldn't be doing it and it's far removed from calling it a hobby , I'm afraid I've not separated from my wife after 44 years over a hobby , I could never insult her with that excuse .
A few years back when i began CDing i was very ashamed by my secret, even tho i enjoyed dressing, so it could have been considered an affliction.
However since i came out to my wife and she has gradually gone from uncertain to supportive it has been amazing to express myself in a whole different way. (at home anyway)
Now i love being a CDer.
"The only way is onward. There is no turning back."
For me, the affliction is my anatomy, not my wardrobe. Somehow, when it came my turn to get born, I got assigned a body of the wrong gender. <oops?>
Yes, I love to dress feminine. But wearing something feminine is more of an effort to feel a little bit like who I'm supposed to be, instead of who I actually am.
For numerous reasons, I can't 'switch sides' - but dipping my toes in the pool from time to time keeps me from suffocating.