Good for you for speaking up- as we need to do that periodically when the usual problems of online communicating arise. This site is special because of inclusiveness, while it is made up of individuals who each have a slightly different view of the elephant in the room- "gender". First problem is that gender is not well defined and has many attributes that are all varying, so people will be sure of their own views and oversimplify in favor of their convenience. Second problem is that people want to share, but more or less unilaterally, so they often don't read carefully, or the poster [me, for good example, is confusing], or terms are simply reacted to instead of analyzed.
I don't know what you went through-but every so often I or someone else will get some scalding comment on being too much of a MIAD for someone else. People don't feel it, so they don't understand it! THe problem of course is that should stimulate asking questions rather than criticizing!
