Yesterday while in Center City Philadelphia, while dressed in my new Madewell dress and consignment shop heels A woman came up to me and told me she'd seen me before and said that I had great style and was gorgeous- wow! Nice to get this kind of conformation that I am headed in in right direction.
I wonder whether it is because we have been read that people go out of their way to comment?
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
Whether it was because I was read or not, if anyone calls me gorgeous I'll accept it with a big smile and as much grace as I can. Good for you girl!
We need pic to see which direction we should go with!
I'll take a compliment any day.
Bev,
That one is something we never know for certain , like others I take them gracioulsy when they do come my way . The point is women often see this situation in a differnt way to us . I must admit I've never had the comment , " Wow , you really do pass !!" I feel they see enough to think female , if they see a certain part of our body or like the outfit they will tell us like they would any GG . We can't rule out a guy getting a compliment if he looks smartly dressed .
I still find the comment I've had a few times now of , " Oh , I wish I looked like you !" One time I was wearing a swim suit in a changing area . It just surprises me a GG saying it to a TG, that is assuming youv'e been read as such .
I would take a complement like that any day. That was very sweet of her.
I believe I have had both form of compliments, once I was shopping for purses in Belk and the SA told me "you are very pretty". I think she meant for a man. A SA in Victoria Secret told me I had beautiful eyes, I am pretty sure she knew I wasn't a woman and I am pretty sure she meant it either way. The blue dress really brought out the blue in my eyes. A little girl outside a pizza place looked at me with great big eyes and said "you look like a princess". I remember all of the positive comments they mean alot. I just seen a thread on a different forum today with memes about when a woman gets a compliment from another woman and when she gets one from a random man.
Last edited by KimberlyJean; 04-18-2019 at 04:28 PM.
Very inciteful, Bev. I've said many times here that when u totally pass, you'll know!:brolleyes:Originally Posted by Beverley Sims
Because I go out a lot and cannot pass, I appreciate nice comments. Especially from women who aren't SA's or servers. Because people r trying to be nice!
However, there have been a few times at masked venues when people actually thot I was a young woman without a doubt! Until I spoke, anyway.
When they think you're actually a female, people treat u WAY DIFFERENT that they do if they know u aren't or aren't sure!
And, that's NOT always good!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Interesting about those memes: That ( those ) women rate the legitimacy of compliments from other women but not from men. I wonder whether, as a CDer, it might be the other way around.
Now, I do not mean men with the inclination to admire, and I obviously do not mean within the community and its support. I mean a random cis guy with total independence. I appreciate kindness when it comes from a random woman --and a couple have said some nice things to me--, but I still have doubts about whether they are just being appreciative of an effort which they can relate to on a deeper level. A straight-up, stonefaced "yeah, you look OK" coming from a random cis guy who has read me would reduce my doubts 100 times more. Wouldn't happen though.
- Lydianne.
Last edited by Lydianne; 04-19-2019 at 03:34 AM.
I think you can tell the tone of the compliment and go from there, if you feel it’s sincere enjoy it if not and it has a negative edge just ignore it and move on.
Crissy
Hi
Sounds like you won the lottery!
If I got a compliment like that I'd take it as it was said, say "Why, thank you very much!", and open a bottle of champagne that night.
To misquote Winston Churchill ... "The terrible 'what does she really mean's accumulate". That way lies madness. There are always other "she _could_ mean ..." thoughts.
Fran
I've been complimented by GGs before. I know I have to learn to accept the compliment and thank them rather than be in shock lol.
I know they know I'm not a GG and feel it's their way of letting me know they accept and support me. I try to look at the positive side.
They/Them
I love dressing as a woman.
:canada:
Those compliments say you should keep dressing, perhaps start dressing more as a woman than as a man. As Betty said, women ACCEPT and compliment you, NOW THAT'S A GENUINE COMPLIMENT.
Absolutely..whenever a compliment or smile is given...it makes my day..congratulations. Picture?
Hi RR, You must've done something right, Keep up the great job. >Orchid ...
+..
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~...
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
I never thought to take a compliment with the attitude of "I wonder what's behind it." Even if I hear a note of sarcasm in their voice, I thank them as if it were a genuine compliment. To me, it's part of owning it. I don't even try to pass, so I'm not being "read". If they're thinking "Aha! I gotcha! You're not really a woman!" they're just idiots. Still, I take the high ground by thanking them and moving on so they don't get a second chance go be stupid.
Women offer complements to random trans and CD women they encounter because it's their way of saying, good for you! you look great! keep it up! Women do not ever, anywhere and at any time, offer complements to other random cis women. I work in an office setting where 99% of the staff is women, I have three sisters and four decades of life experience. Take the complement and don't think about the why behind it.
rockerreds, that's a wonderful comment. Good for you.
Please call me Jamie, I always_have crossdressed, I always will, "alwayshave".
I agree. Mainly. Women actually do compliment each other on stuff they are wearing (even random strangers) but not on physical aspects unless they know each other well.
There might be a slightly patronizing aspect of women complimenting CDs/trans but I do think they mean well. If you dwell on that you might become too mean spirited. Some women might get annoyed that a man opens a door for them but it was well intentioned.
I'm afraid this isn't true for everyone. My wife gets compliments all the time (no hyperbole). She has grey hair and colours parts of it bright pink, sometimes purple. And she gets random people complimenting her almost every time we go out. And if it's not her hair it's something else like what she's wearing. Maybe we live in a part of the world where people feel they can be more open and friendly? IDK.
They/Them
I love dressing as a woman.
:canada:
Take the compliment, smile and let it be.
Try not to make more (or less) than what it is.
If you were in drab, at work, and you received a compliment on your work performance, would you analyze it for hidden meanings?
Before you can love another, you must first like yourself
I Aim To Misbehave
Labels belong on BOXES, not PEOPLE!
Monica, either you are wrong or I am not a very good cis woman because I do compliment other random cis women and receive complements from other random cis women. Two sisters and 5+decades of life experience tells me you are wrong.
Rockerreds, It is important to learn how to take a complement with grace ( a simple thank you is always appropiate) and not look for any hidden meaning behind it.
My first time out was at the Maryland Renn Fest. I got a lot of smiles from GGs. I was pretty sure that they clocked me, but the smile said, "You go girl" to me.
While today the best I could get is you look good for your age, and that would be kind. I cant look young and pretty and the years have not been kind. As I looked at some of the women that I grew up with they don't look great either. As a late teen living much of the time as a girl my acceptance among girls was the key to me. Girls my age complementing me was validation. Having a soft fem voice let me interact with people. I'm sure that most all never realized that was not a young girl.
I still get compliments on what I wear such as, I like that top or that is a pretty top.
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