Hopefully this thread isn't a repeat topic. A couple of other current threads have compelled me to write this one.
When I was at grad school, back in my late 20s, I would get around in my late father's old Harris tweed coat, the buttons of which I had replaced with some hippyish, effeminate ones. I also bought a speckly blue women's rayon scarf with long tassels to go with it. I didn't think what I wearing was the least bit challenging to accepted norms and believed I was surrounded by accepting, if not progressively minded people.
I later found out that probably this attire, and probably my relaxed and non-committal attitude to certain topics of conversation, had caused a fellow student to assume I was gay. We got along fine initially, and I even did a bit of on-campus work with him. Then at some point he discovered I actually liked girls - hell, I didn't think it was concealed - and he turned majorly sour. Ended up with him telling me he'd like to throw me through a sheetrock wall. He was very straight, jockish even. Turns out, as I heard from others, he just couldn't deal with the ambiguity. You know the attitude: the "I have to know!" type. It was like I had intentionally caused him pychological damage by not clearly presenting my sexuality, which is Bi I should add. Maybe that was the thought that most repulsed him. I don't know.
This is but one instance in a lifetime of similar smites dating back to early grade school, with the odd bashing here and there.
I like ambiguity. Though I get the impression that many on this forum would prefer it to be resolved one way or the other. Is it just external pressures that cause that angst of needing resolution, or is the resolution a healthy thing to want? I suppose you can't separate one from the other. Maybe there's some of you with similar life experiences to me that just make you constantly go WTF?! Leave me alone! Get on with your own life!