Just my current working hypothesis...
When a husband or boyfriend comes out to his SO, it's may not be the actual CD behaviors the guy is presenting that causes so many women problems.
If the male in the relationship is displaying or presenting feminine characteristics, that can challenge the female to examine her own gender and sexual identity and issues. She may not want to pull back that curtain to see what's hiding behind it. She more afraid of her inner self than she is afraid of the CDing. Her negativity directed at her husband can be a projection of her feeling about herself.
When she says something like "I can't live with CD you." She really means "I can't live with what I might be."
