Fascinating discussion and full of lots of variations and similarities. Back in December 2012 and January 2013 when in therapy I seriously considered transitioning, but as I got to know more transwomen I realized that there was a poor match between my mental view and theirs. Wonderful women for sure, but it did not seem to fit me. When I first came out (August 2012) I did the "What category am I in?" dance and my initial fit seemed to be in what was then called androgynous (now mostly non-binary). That fits me quite well, but when my mind wanders over toward the female-like side the transition thinking pops in. I consider myself non-binary, but I always keep in mind that this is flexible thing and it can always shift in any direction. In a word, don't reject any possibility.

I agree with Dorit that how you are oriented in your gender is a function of certain brain configurations. It has little to do with your sex and the science shows that is very much the case. I strongly accept the findings of Dr. Daphna Joel (U. of Tel Aviv) Gender Mosaic Theory. Basically, our genders are a mosaic of female-like, male-like, and intermediate gender traits and characteristics and associated behaviors most of which are learned but are supported by the configuration of our brains as a result of genetic and environmental influences. And your personal mosaic changes as it revolves around a particular basic pattern of thinking and perception. In a sense, everybody's gender is a shape-shifter that has certain boundaries established by your genetics.

Most trans people seem to start out about the same way - curiosity and experimentation driven by some deeply seated "need." But in the course of our lives it all becomes more and more refined. Some find points that bring happiness and stability while others keep going and eventually find themselves completely reversed from what is the stereotypical and traditional expectation. Kind of a "If it fits wear it" kind of thing.

It is a beautiful thing to see a person find a place where they are happy, stable, and secure within themselves. It is where we should all end up with the full achievement of that which fits you best. If it is full transition or something less defined - it doesn't really matter. What matters is whether you are secure in that place. The flip side to that coin is that the neural mosaic can change and evolve and thus a stability at one point may last for awhile, possibly a long while, and then it may shift in a direction that is consistent with our basic configuration that defines the outline of our gender sense of self.