I do agree with everyone who says it IS a big NO NO to wear your wife's clothes without permission.
That brings up your quandary of not being able to buy your own clothes. Many women have never heard of CDers (I realize this may be hard for CDers to grasp). I get the feeling that your wife doesn't know how much dressing means to you. You wouldn't be asking these questions if you could simply forget about it and not dress at all.
That leaves you with the advice that Stephanie gave, talk more about your feelings of why you like to dress and how you feel if you can't. Then educate her about YOU. She needs to know those things. If you don't know yourself, then how can she know? Are you "miserable" if you can't dress? Or can you take it or leave it? Possibly during any subsequent talk, you could work out some arrangement to dress privately. You also need to find out what her objection is to your dressing in private? Her just saying "No" does not mean a future conversation is not possible.
It's not an easy concept for some women who find out that some men, especially their man, likes to dress in women's clothes. To some, clothes are just body covering and they don't understand why a man would care about wearing a woman's body covering. Explain how you feel inside.
