Yep, pretty much where I'm coming from, too.Originally Posted by Heisthebride
And as long as you're not being all weird about it, and you look pretty presentable, making it work for you? Then yeah, it can be a pretty cool thing.
It's crazy how some GG's initially react when they first see you. I mean, some of us have been living here for a number of years now, so obviously they're used to seeing me wearing like a hoodie & women's leggings all the time. But when you're wearing a carefully-chosen skirt & tights?? :confused2:
One quick example, GG-neighbor & I have known each for at least several years now. She's always been very on-board with it all from the start, with an uncanny knack of seeing me in some very femmy outfits, ha! Anyway, one evening I'm taking out the trash, with an obvious female profile/silhouette as a result of my outfit, and she's a bit behind me, not yet knowing that it's me. All she sees in front of her is, well, what appears to be an unknown adult woman who's a bit dressed up, yet still keeping it a little casual, too.
Anyway, trash in the dumpster, turn around, start heading back. We're now face-to-face, heading towards each other. Her reaction was priceless!
She had no idea it was a dude, LOL. Biggest grins on both our faces. She was like, "Yo... *GUUUUUURRRRRLLLLL!!*" She was pleasantly surprised & genuinely impressed. :p
And now she (and quite a few others) has now already seen me like this. I know she's totally down with it, as I figured she would. So, going forward? I mean, I do enjoy wearing skirts/tights during colder months (within reason!). Not a big deal to her. Good to know!
A GG-neighbor of a younger generation moved in last year. Our assigned parking is right next to each other. We've become great friends pretty quickly & easily. And she only knows me as trans, I guess you could say?Totally fine with it, doesn't phase her at all.
We even got all dolled-up for Halloween, partying a bit with her fiance (non-CD'ing male) in our costumes. It was crazy!Honestly, I thought those days were over, but it was really fun.
And none of that would have happened, if I just kept the CD'ing behind closed doors, ya know? Also got a lot of honest feedback from her... She has confirmed that yes, multiple times, she originally thought a male/female couple shared my car!
So, when you're open from the start? Kinda makes things a whole lot easier & simpler.
Anyway, there are things you can do, that I do, anyway, when dressing like this in guy-mode. For example, I keep a clean-shaven face pretty much at all times. I just don't think any kind of facial hair or even 5-o'clock shadow goes well with a short kicky skirt, ha! I also think some kind of head-wear is important, whether it's some kind of hat or whatever... My hood gives the general idea or impression of longer fuller hair -- or at least the best it could, considering I'm not wearing a wig.
So, I do try to help steer others' views on me, with minor cosmetic cues/markers, anyway, to make it a bit easier for them to digest. If that means I have to shift a bit more to the feminine side to make it work, without going uncomfortably overboard (for both parties!), then so be it. Enjoy it! I'm not here to shock, or make some kind of statement. Just want to live a normal life, and have a good & natural interaction with people.
I kinda put the ball in their court, too... Again, view & treat me how you genuinely want to. The freedom & choice is theirs, whatever they're comfortable with. Don't want to associate with me like this? Fair enough, we'll keep our courteous distance. Want to really embrace it, on the other hand? No qualms there, either.
Another thing I should mention, is that I don't really alter my voice. I just use my normal voice. Granted, I try to keep my throat clear. And I simply just try to let myself relax & feel free to adjust to what I'm wearing & how it's making me feel. Weird, but I end up being more friendly, talkative, smiling, polite, etc. And at the same time, my voice just naturally follows a more feminine version without thinking or forcing. Again, something else minor to help others bridge this different kind of gender gap.
I think it would be weird in my case if I tried using an intentional female voice (regardless how convincing it may or may not be, LOL!). If I did, I feel I would be now pushing others to accept me, perhaps creating a bit of stress or throwing them off a little, as female/GG/transwoman/etc., ya know? And I don't want that. How they relate to me is on them.
Anyway, everyone just has to follow their own path. Skirt & tights in guy-mode not your thang? Not an issue. Not for everyone, understood. Heck, it obviously wasn't for me, either -- at least for the longest time. These days, sometimes I legit feel uncomfortable *not* wearing that!
And BTW, having a supportive someone in your life, like my new neighbor-bestie? Invaluable. I've done pretty well on my own throughout the years, but really takes a weight off when you need it. I make it known to her from time to time that I do appreciate her in my life. Always great having a welcomed buddy in your corner!
