Might I suggest that instead of a direct dialog, you write down your thoughts and give him the letter. Then, give him a chance to digest the information and think things through. Often, the male part of him wants to "retreat into his den," when he's working on a big problem like this. Women often believe it's better to "talk it out, often immediately."
Just an idea, but it might work out better. "She knows," is going to be a big shock. My guess is that he may be dumbfounded and will not say anything.
After you give him the letter, wait until the next day, or the next weekend, and ask him if he wants to talk about it. If he doesn't respond, you then will know that he still wants to keep a "barrier" up on this subject. And, you will have some idea where you stand.
Peace and Love, Joanie
