Cherish You GG

First of all, I want to let all of the CD's here know that they need to cherish the support they get from their GGs. I have been wearing ladies panties for a long time and still have not found a supportive GG. I don't think that most CD understand how hard it is to find a supportive SO.

Here are some facts about me.

I don't shave my bodily hair.
I don't wear bras
I don't wear suspenders or stockings.
I don't wear wigs
I don't wear makeup
I don't polish my nails
I don't wear dresses or skirts
I don't wear any female articles of female cloth except panties.
I DON't want to be a woman!

I have browsed this forum for a few days and see so many supportive GG. I feel like I might have a better chance at finding a wonderful, supportive GG if I did do all of the above.
I'm not ridiculing the Cders on the forum that do dress in full female garb, I'm just so damn frustrated b/c I like to wear panties and I still have not found a supportive GG.

I want to hear from the GG on this forum. Comments from the CD are welcome as well. Do I stand a better chance if I dress in full female attire? It seems to me that panties are pretty harmless. Why don't GG feel the same way?

:angry:

OK, a lot of this depends on the exact situation.

Do you EVER wear men's underwear?

When are you telling your potential partners about the panties?

Maybe you are just telling them too soon. I wouldn't even bother until the relationship gets to the point where you think it might become intimate. If you want to provide more details, everyone else can probably provide better advice.

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Originally Posted by moses

OK, a lot of this depends on the exact situation.

Do you EVER wear men's underwear?

When are you telling your potential partners about the panties?

Maybe you are just telling them too soon. I wouldn't even bother until the relationship gets to the point where you think it might become intimate. If you want to provide more details, everyone else can probably provide better advice.

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I never wear panties in public. Always boxers. I don't even wear panties 7 days a week. I only wear them maybe 3 days a week at most. Yes. I do tell them from the get go. I feel like they deserve to know these things before we get intimate. Am I wrong for this?

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Originally Posted by Notbychoice

I feel like I might have a better chance at finding a wonderful, supportive GG if I did do all of the above.:angry:

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OK! Try it, you might like it! Then you could always say that "Really, I only like the panties, but I wear the dress for you..."

I really think that "supportive" GG's are rare. There are quite a few that will tolerate, maybe even say nice things, but those that say "Lets go out tonight as girls!" are pretty darn rare indeed.

I hope you find love someday... that is really what is supportive. If your looking for a GG who's into crossdressers, that might be a pretty small pool to draw from.

:hugs:Shannen

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Originally Posted by Shannen

OK! Try it, you might like it! Then you could always say that "Really, I only like the panties, but I wear the dress for you..."

I really think that "supportive" GG's are rare. There are quite a few that will tolerate, maybe even say nice things, but those that say "Lets go out tonight as girls!" are pretty darn rare indeed.

I hope you find love someday... that is really what is supportive. If your looking for a GG who's into crossdressers, that might be a pretty small pool to draw from.

:hugs:Shannen

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I appreciate your reply,but I don't have the least bit of interest in those things. I don't wanna wear them. I just feel it's a waste of time for me to do so.

I think the others are right it's more than likely the timing. I would wait till you both have a mutual respect and understanding of each other and if the girl really cares it will not matter.

But I'm single too. Can't find the right girl so take the advice for what
it's worth.

Ok you have a few choices but sounds like you should buy guy undies and pretend they are girl panties !! That way you may feel normal ??? Most GG's probly dont care what fabric underware your wearing if they are interested in you for other reasons.

Cindy

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Originally Posted by Shannen

OK! Try it, you might like it! Then you could always say that "Really, I only like the panties, but I wear the dress for you..."

I really think that "supportive" GG's are rare. There are quite a few that will tolerate, maybe even say nice things, but those that say "Lets go out tonight as girls!" are pretty darn rare indeed.

I hope you find love someday... that is really what is supportive. If your looking for a GG who's into crossdressers, that might be a pretty small pool to draw from.

:hugs:Shannen

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To be honest, I have tried dressing fully. The bra was uncomfortable, and the rest just didn't look right. I'm not a passable CD and I never will be. I like being a guy, but I like to wear panties sometimes as well. I have been in some relationships that women actually tried to be supportive, but in the long run, they just couldn't.

Here are some things I understand:

Women cherish their panties as a very close part of their femininity.

They don't want you wearing their panties. You are gonna stretch them out and they won't be able to wear them anymore.

They think it's gross.

They think it's weird (They just can't wrap they minds around the concept of why a man would want to wear them)

They think you might be gay and leave them for man.

I really need some advice. Should I just give up panties? I see a lot of comments about give an take in relationships. Should I just "give" them up even though I don't feel like I should?

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Originally Posted by cindybarnes

Ok you have a few choices but sounds like you should buy guy undies and pretend they are girl panties !! That way you may feel normal ??? Most GG's probly dont care what fabric underware your wearing if they are interested in you for other reasons.

Cindy

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Guys underwear is so boring! I like panties! :daydreaming:

Just don't give up. Be yourself and be confident. The right lady will come along and love you no matter what you wear.

NOOOOO! It's not just something you can give up. It's a part of you that any potential partner must be supportive of for you to feel whole. I just don't think your timing is right. If you have been together for a while and are considering being intimate, she is probably already so interested in you that it won't matter. Experiment with the timing. I can't offer any more advice than this: first date too early, after engagement too late

Good Luck!

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Originally Posted by Notbychoice

I never wear panties in public. Always boxers. I don't even wear panties 7 days a week. I only wear them maybe 3 days a week at most. Yes. I do tell them from the get go. I feel like they deserve to know these things before we get intimate. Am I wrong for this?

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So you don't wear panties in public, and then in private it's just 3 times a week. You don't want to actually dress like a woman. It sounds like you have no desire to actually be feminine. Is wearing panties just something that turns you on that like to do now and then in the evening? It seems like this is something that would be easy to keep to yourself, and in that regard, it's pretty aggressive and inappropriate for you to dump that on a woman before you even have a serious enough relationship to sleep together.

You're totally sabotaging your relationships. Do you tell everybody you meet that you like to wear panties? Let's put this in perspective. Masturbating is a totally normal thing, but would you tell someone you just started dating that you like to masturbate three times a week? Maybe tell her what your favorite kind of porn is? That's totally unreasonable behavior.

I really don't think you're going to get very good advice, though, without going into a little more detail about why you like to wear panties. You've been clear that your less than enthusiastic about being girly, so I question how much you need to do this.

I mean, a crossdresser who has purged several times is always going to obsess about dressing and will never be able to stop forever, but if you just think it's fun to wear panties now and then, and that single thing is ruining your relationships, feel free to stop wearing the panties.

And be careful what you wish for. I'm currently being stalked by a GG I met en femme and went out with a few times.
:doh:

What GG Support? I don't have any. :sw:

I wanted to thank all of the replies and advice I got on this. He is a little more about me and how I came this love of panties.

This is going to be so cliche, but here it goes. I started by experimenting with my sisters panties when I was very young and got very turned on by the feeling of the material, the patterns on them and the way they looked on me. From then on I was hooked. I have experimented with all of the other items of lingerie, but found them most uncomfortable. I know why girls can't wait to take their bras off at the end of the day. If I had to wear them all day every day, I'd hate them too. Panyhose are only good for keeping your legs warm and can get itchy and then you scratch and make a run in them. Get the hairspray!!! :eek: When guys shave, they have the shave ALL of their bodies and the hair is so much thicker and grows back thicker each time we shave. Having hair grow back around your private parts is itchy. You want to scratch so bad, but you don't want people to think you have crabs or are playing "pocket pool.

That being said, I just can't stop wearing them. I used to wear panties in public. but have gotten caught. The humiliation is just too much to deal with, so I don't do that anymore either. I wear them at night after work and yes, they are a HUGE turn on for me. Like I said in a previous post, I have had SOs that really tried their best to understand and be supportive. They just "didn't get it". I've heard that over and over. GG really do have a hard time understanding why guys would want to wear panties, so I can't blame them for leaving if they "just don't get it". However, these are the same GG that want to wear your long sleeve over-sized shirts and boxers. ummmm..."Honey? I just don't get why you want to wear my boxers and shirts. I'm leaving you! NOT! It's just a double standard that society has made OK.

If anyone would like more information, feel free to post and ask. I do feel comfortable sharing here.

IMO, hun, it's not the panties that the GGs can't understand, it's your words not matching your actions.

You say it's just panties, just a fetish, but you can't stop, they are a huge turn on for you and you definitely express a tremendous amount of shame for doing it.

Drives my husband nuts, but people you are close to can usually tell when something's being omitted or covered up. We may not know what, but many can certainly tell when karma is out of balance. You words of "this is no big deal" are followed with actions showing what a big deal it is. I do congratulate you for choosing GGs who are secure in themselves and also not controlling. Instead of trying to change you, they understand they don't want to live with the incongruity and move on.

Get right with yourself. Love yourself and stop trying to be what someone else wants you to be - that's exhausting! Once you get your psychie peaceful and aligned, the relationships will just fall into place. Good luck!

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Originally Posted by Notbychoice

I can't blame them for leaving if they "just don't get it". However, these are the same GG that want to wear your long sleeve over-sized shirts and boxers. ummmm..."Honey? I just don't get why you want to wear my boxers and shirts. I'm leaving you! NOT! It's just a double standard that society has made OK.

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Well, they see it as a deviant thing. I don't think those GGs are getting turned on by wearing your oversized shirts.

Since you're still not expressing much of a desire to be feminine, I think this might be more of a taboo thing for you. You sound kinda like wearing panties is just the most convenient kinky thing you can think of to do. I'm not saying that's a bad thing -- we all have widely varying degrees of how much we want to express our feminine side vs. how much of a pure turn-on dressing is.

I think it's funny that panties are the last thing I'm interested in. I like shaving, and wearing a bra, and thigh-highs, and perfume, and makeup, but panties? I don't get much out of the experience of wearing panties. It just kinda bothers me that I can't fit into them in any kind of girly way. Feels kinda gross.

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Originally Posted by moses

When are you telling your potential partners about the panties?
Maybe you are just telling them too soon. I wouldn't even bother until the relationship gets to the point where you think it might become intimate. If you want to provide more details, everyone else can probably provide better advice.

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agreed...its not a big deal wearing panies but maybe you scare them off making it a big deal.

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Originally Posted by Tree GG

IMO, hun, it's not the panties that the GGs can't understand, it's your words not matching your actions.
You say it's just panties, just a fetish, but you can't stop, they are a huge turn on for you and you definitely express a tremendous amount of shame for doing it.
Get right with yourself. Love yourself and stop trying to be what someone else wants you to be - that's exhausting! Once you get your psychie peaceful and aligned, the relationships will just fall into place. Good luck!

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Just be you...........if panties are your thing....its your thing
just feel good about yourself...relax and like Tree has said stop trying to be what someone else wants and be yourself.

You must consider yourself valuable and worth while. There are many GG's that could care less about the underdressing in panties. Buy your own and wear them proudly.

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Originally Posted by Shawna13

You must consider yourself valuable and worth while. There are many GG's that could care less about the underdressing in panties. Buy your own and wear them proudly.

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All of those GG must live in the NE. :heehee: I love this forum, cause all of the understanding GG are right here.

I guess one could have guessed by my forum name how I feel about my fetish. I feel that by having a fetish for women's underthings I have omitted myself from about 90% of the dating pool. I guess I just want to be a normal guy. I feel abnormal and have felt this way for many years. I'm not sure my feelings will ever change about this. I have some conservative views about life. That I know will never change. I'm tired of answering the same old questions from prospective SOs. "Are you gay?" "Have you ever been with another man?" "Do you want a sex change?" etc etc etc. I really do understand that these questions need to be answered for a fruitful relationship to progress, but frankly, I'm tired of answering them and the relationship fall apart.

Am I truly happy about my fetish? Hell no. I didn't ask for this, but I can't stop. I didn't say ask the supreme being (whomever you consider Him to be) "Could you please give me a panty fetish? That would be so great!" As my forum name states, not by choice.

I am sorry for rambling, but I guess I need to get these feelings off my chest. Thanks for listening.

I don't believe what you wear has much to do with whether you find a supportive partner or not. It's more about personality, at least at first.

Obviously if your first sentence is "Hi, my name is John, I like to wear panties, but I'm not a full-time CD, I'm not into wearing dress, and I'm not gay etc. etc.", then you might sound a little offputting to prospective partners.

But, if you just focus on having a good time and getting to know the other person first, you'll have a much better chance of meeting your match. There's always time for life-choice explanations once you get to know them better.

"...from prospective SOs. .."

Why do I get the feeling that your search for a girlfriend is kinda like going to the pound to search for a lapdog?

If one after another woman drops you after you tell 'em about the pantie thing, it's not the panties! Like a few others have said or hinted at...it's something about your presentaion or attitude that's making them uneasy. Just like me!

I'm not sensing a whole lotta respect for women here. If I'm wrong, then what we got here is a failure to communicate. If I'm right, then you'll never find a girlfriend that'll please you in this modern age.

Sorry if this is a little harsh, but that's what my reading of your original and subsequent post says to me. (Despite your other thread about taking care of your GG!)

Ya need to stop thinking of your pantie thing as a curse. This little thing is coloring your appreciation of people and relationships.

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Originally Posted by deja true

"...from prospective SOs. .."

Why do I get the feeling that your search for a girlfriend is kinda like going to the pound to search for a lapdog?

If one after another woman drops you after you tell 'em about the pantie thing, it's not the panties! Like a few others have said or hinted at...it's something about your presentaion or attitude that's making them uneasy. Just like me!

I'm not sensing a whole lotta respect for women here. If I'm wrong, then what we got here is a failure to communicate. If I'm right, then you'll never find a girlfriend that'll please you in this modern age.

Sorry if this is a little harsh, but that's what my reading of your original and subsequent post says to me. (Despite your other thread about taking care of your GG!)

Ya need to stop thinking of your pantie thing as a curse. This little thing is coloring your appreciation of people and relationships.

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How charming this reply is. :blah: You're comparing my search for a SO to a lapdog. You're encouragement is nothing short of spectacular! :brolleyes: Please don't go into the medical profession, because bedside manner is not your thing. I have pretty much given up on finding a SO. If it happens, it happens. If not. I'm ok with that too, but please show some respect for those who have been trying for years to find a SO with no luck. I do agree with everyone but you who has posted as a reply, so I think I'll go a bit more in depth.

I'm not looking for a lapdog. I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel about my fetish and can support my feelings on the subject.

To me, this IS a big deal! Ever hear this? "One person's perception are THEIR reality" If I never find a SO, I really am ok with that, I was simply looking for others supportive opinions, unlike yours. I recant my other opinions. By having a panty fetish, I have removed myself from 90.01% of the dating pool!

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Originally Posted by Notbychoice

How charming this reply is. :blah: You're comparing my search for a SO to a lapdog. You're encouragement is nothing short of spectacular! :brolleyes: Please don't go into the medical profession, because bedside manner is not your thing. I have pretty much given up on finding a SO. If it happens, it happens. If not. I'm ok with that too, but please show some respect for those who have been trying for years to find a SO with no luck. I do agree with everyone but you who has posted as a reply, so I think I'll go a bit more in depth.

I'm not looking for a lapdog. I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel about my fetish and can support my feelings on the subject.

To me, this IS a big deal! Ever hear this? "One person's perception are THEIR reality" If I never find a SO, I really am ok with that, I was simply looking for others supportive opinions, unlike yours. I recant my other opinions. By having a panty fetish, I have removed myself from 90.01% of the dating pool!

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I'll start by telling u I'm old. Forget my avatar. According to the stats on this site, I'm REALLY old. I have had some experience in life, if nothing else.

I think I've found the secret to a good life, and going to tell u what it is.
"U need to find out how to make yourself happy, and then do it. "

Too easy u say? Hardly! I was 45+, before I realized I was finally living the life I wanted, and that I was usually happy! I big change from my younger, angry years! Something very funny happened shortly after that. I met a beautiful woman, got married, ( my only one), and had a family. And that same "living my life the way that makes me happy" feeling, brought me to CDing at age 55.

NBC, my point is this. U and others that u meet, can get into pissing contests the rest of your lives. Or, u mite get some professional help. I'm NOT saying you're nuts or NEED help. U don't. But, a good therapist can help u find the u, that could make u into a happy guy. And I predict a HAPPY u, will have no problems with friends, women, or anything else that involves people!

One of the best things about therapy is; it's all about u! It's really the untimate indulgence, if u think about it. I guess that explains why my ex has been going for 10+ years now! Altho if u ask her, she'll probably say it's all MY fault! I went to one, too, during our divorce. After a few visits, she said I didn't need her anymore. I think discussing my early attempts at CDing was puting her to sleep! If she could only see me now!

I wish u piece, ( and peace), happiness, and a fun, but interesting, life!

"...You're encouragement is nothing short of spectacular! Please don't go into the medical profession, because bedside manner is not your thing. "

Ever hear this? "A sneer is the weapon of the weak."

I did say that it seems we have a failure to commnicate here, eh?

But what I posted is no different than what others said, just in plainer language.

Your sarcasm and confrontational style, if it carries over into your search for an accepting SO, may possibly be your reason for failure.

Sure, you'll get support here, but you have to take the bare opinion with the sugared replies as well.

I wasn't being aggro, just plain spoken. Sure we like to emulate women, but some of us like to emulate strong women not the compliant Barbies of so many's fantasies.

You'll get the opinions you ask for, not always just the ones you want to hear.

The thread starter is having a problem with all this, thread closed.

Karen Starlene :star: