Has all CDer's had a same sex experience

I am bisexual with more of a physical preference for men no matter how I am dressed. There is just something about the way they feel, the way a fit chest, calves and butt look, they way they touch me, the way they smell when aroused, just their way, that gets my motor humming. I'm picky though, I like men who take care of themselves physcially, can take care of me and can carry on a decent conversation.

But I know I like women too. For me, this is more complex because for me with women it is much more about who she is as a person. With women I can much more easily overlook some things because with women it is our relationship, usually the intimacy of our friendship that ignites a sexual spark.

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Originally Posted by SarahHall

I am bi sexual and very comfortable with it.:hugs:

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i have only had one same sex encounter i really enjoyed it and would do it again given the chance .

Does anyone find that they would only entertain the idea of being with a man while they're dressed?

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Originally Posted by kaitlyna

Does anyone find that they would only entertain the idea of being with a man while they're dressed?

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Well...so far that's exactly it! sort of.....maybe.....kind of.....i guess


???

Warning: This post is likely to be long, and test some social boundaries. Skip if you dont want to read it all

because it likely wont make sense otherwise ( and even then).

I'd consider myself a society induced baby bi. I cross a number of society's boundaries in my life, starting with my

interest in bdsm. I'm primarily dominant with my partners but that doesnt necessarily mean I'm strictly that way. I

filled the role of a submissive/heavy bottom for nearly 13 years. During that time I was with a partner who often

ridiculed and feared homosexuality. We had discussed bisexuality at various points and i had admitted that I

harboured some bicuriousness and was often made fun of for that. Add to that that I come from an extremely

strait-laced family and you can see some of the societal pressure areas to conform. We really are taught from birth

to conform to societies rules and two of them happen to be not to crossdress and not to have sex with the same

gender.
Now here's the strange thing. I didnt crossdress especially for almost 10 of those 13 years, and when i did it was

in secret, for fear of being belittled for it, which did eventually happen . But I did have some bisexual fantasies, and they had to do with my submissive side . And even stranger still I've never explored these fantasies, when I have been with men I've been dominant.Perhaps there's still some fear or apprehension there, but I think it's something I WOULD do now.
Now contast that environment with where I stand now. I have explored my bisexual side ( and embraced it) but I really could not...and would not...have done so without the assistance and support and yes a fairly good shove by my present partner and you can see what a HUGE effect the environment around us has on what we are willing to do.
Now the human brain is a strange and wonderful thing. Often when we do supress some things they come up in other and sometimes innapropriate places. We on this board are our OWN society to a very large degree. And we are supportive of one another and try to shy away from degredation or belittleing others. I would be really not be surprised to find that we have a larger percentage of gay or bisexual members here, and that the number would likely exceed what would be indicated by self -reporting as at least one person seems to ave indicated when they mentioned they are often approached by people who said they were strictly heterosexual. This would indicate to me at least that normal societal pressure still has an effect, even in our smaller society. I have srtrong suspicians that the " it will come back if you try and stop" aspect of crossdressing is closely related to bisexuality, and it may well be that a large percentage of those reporting such that may explore bisexuality. Some will conced to whichever societal pressures ( be that from a spouse , the general society or from here) others will resist more or not be willing to admit it ...even to themselves. And you dont necessarily have to like the look of men to be bisexual either. I dont look at most men that way, in fact I do tend to look for feminine qualities in my guys like nice hips and feminine facial features but I think that has more to do with THEIR having a good time than mine as odd as that sounds.

I'd be really interested to see what a poll would say. I think it would HAVE to be anonymous. And even then the results wouldnt be anywhere near scientific but may indicate a higher percentage here than elsewhere. Some psychiatrist who's name escapes me ( and that someone here will probably come up with the name of) said that it's somewhere near 10% but there's argument these numbers arent accurate either. But I think even in this thread we've seen far in excess of 3 % which is another number I've seen bandied around. The cause and effect here could be from any number of factors, including menal openness to ignoring societies regulations

So in short:
yes i'm bisexual
I enjoy it tremendously.
I think there would be a hefty number more bisexuals or homosexuals if it wasnt a sort of societal taboo.


Amanada
The Happy ****!

Yes I do enjoy both sides of the aisle....but to eaches own I suppose. I sit squarely in Amanda's camp...

On another note, I CAN differentiate between sex and love, you can have sex without love, just as you can have love without sex...sometimes we are lucky where where we can have sex & love if we are lucky(as I do with my wife) however I do enjoy sex with others but...I feel the only 1 I can and do truly LOVE is my wife...confused?... you betcha!!!!!! most of us gurlz always are...:)

Lately I have been having a desire to introduce another man into our love relationship.I believe that my femininity ie having my breasts against hers, has detracted from my wife's ability to experience a true orgasmic episode as she would experience while with a 'real' man,
I also imagine being used sexually by this man as the sissy I am.:o

i am married and bi i have not been with a man for 20 plus years but my dressing does seem to bring out the woman in me that wants to be with a man.

Nope, strictly hetro. I've had fantasies about being with another couple (or woman) but still hetro.

aaaaaaall male,but dress me up anything can happen

I would use the term 'heteroflexible' or even bi-curious. I've never been with a guy before, but I would consider it if the circumstances were right. I'd be open to a relationship with a TG also.

When I am dressed I am a woman...in all respects including responding to a man.

My first proper forum post, hooray.

I have only had sex with girls, but i've kissed a few boys. The way i feel about that experience is a good microcosm for how i feel about hetro/homo sex in general; beautiful, well build, sexy men and women attract me equally as much, and my fantasies are divided between the two depending on my mood, but i ENJOY having sex with girls more, because they're generally much softer and sensuous.

I've always wanted to have sex with a very hot boy with an amazing body while i was in the utmost of ****ty CD. That would blow my mind. He would have to be incredibly sexy though - a prime statuesque male, not simply a male for the sake of it. Being treated like a girl but a breathtakingly sexy man would make me feel incredible.

Give me a soft curvy girl any day of the week though.

sorry if that was fence-sitting. I'm too open minded sometimes.

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Originally Posted by paulaluvssz8

I am a hetrosexual. Very much in love with my wife. And lately on this forum I have noticed alot of the members are talking about having relationships with men and women. So it made me wonder how many CDer's have done this and is this a reason for some who CD to help them identify their sexual idenity...

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I guess I'm unusual, particularly these days - I've only ever had sex with one person, and we've been a partnership for 28 years now (legal for 23).

Personally I've never fantasised about sex with any man - but I've been known to flirt on a few occasions... :whistling:


But as to 'has all CDer's had a same sex experience' surely that's like saying 'have all men', or 'all women' - the answer is bound to be down to the individual? :strugglin

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Originally Posted by TV Wannabe

No, but I am a little intrigued by it.

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My wife too is worried about it, we have had 3somes in the past with other guys well twice, and once i did perform with HIM for her I am BI but I dont push that onto her .Im happy 2 be with her sexually as long as I can be ME>>>:devil:

I wonder if gay men have similar stereotypes as we do about them?

Why such a fear of homosexuality I wonder? I don't buy into the lesbian when dressed thing but that tis just me and I don't think I could say it was wrong.

My feelings change as often as my mood I guess. I was born a man. I do not consider myself a crossdresser. I am more attracted to men than women.

When I was a child I was raised to believe homosexuality is a moral sin. as I grew up I associated with gay communities more than straight.

As I got older I still had an almost subconscious apprehension of homosexuality much like a hidden voice saying "hate gays".

Over the last several years I have finally given up that foolishness.

I have never slept with a man and for the last I do not know how many years, have not had sex period. I just did not feel like it.

I find women attractive but no longer in a purely sexual way. It is more an admiration when i see a very beautiful and attractive woman, I appreciate her.

When I see a very beautiful man it is more sexual but I could never see myself as a man with a man. Not because I see it as wrong but because at my core I have a soul, if I believed in such, as a woman and it is as a woman I want to have a relationship.

I don't know what that makes me nor do I really care. Sex is not my driving force and attraction is attraction regardless of the gender of the person.

I would prefer a long term relationship with a wonderful man but only as a woman.

I would and could have sex with a woman but I just do not think I could have the same deep feelings as I once thought I could.

This is why I think living life without barriers of sex and orientation is so much healthier, it allows us to truly grow.

Nope!

I consider myself bi but attracted to females. I would never want to kiss or cuddle with a man. I have never fallen in love with a man. But I have been sexually submissive to a man (use your imagination) and loved it. I have never been with a sexy CD but would like to try.

When I was young, 12-14, I had sexual relations with one person, the same person each time. Even during that time I was never attracted to males, always looked at Penthouse magazines, etcetera. I think it was just being young, horny, and getting release with someone I knew well and was comfortable with. I have always regretted having done that, but I must admit that the one time I took it from behind it was physically stimulating. I've never done it with another male since then. I've had fantasies when dressed, but as soon as the fun is over, its the last thing I want to think about. I am entralled by the female body. In a fetish type of mood, if I was dressed sexy, and a femenine looking CD came around, and the planets were aligned, I might consider it, but I'm afraid I would regret it later, so I stick to fantasy and am satisfied with that.

Laura

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Originally Posted by TxKimberly

Here's one I bet not many can say! I've only been to bed with one woman in my life - my wife of 20 years. I have no interest in men.

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Close.

2 women, 5 men

1st wife, married 30 years, divorced
2nd wife, married nearly 3 years, seems to be working out

All the men were about sex. Fun, but no long term relationship was pursued. 2nd wife knows all about me and it's not a problem. The last time I slept with a man was several years before I started crossdressing.

No guy,s for this girl.

I have and only while dressed. Yes, it did "complete" the process. Just as my wife presumed "Why go to all the trouble with makeup, jewelry, clothes" if not to attract a man. Being wanted and desired is fun no matter how you are dressed and to know you've pleased someone, makes the experience all the better.

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Originally Posted by Desiree2bababe

Why go to all the trouble with makeup, jewelry, clothes" if not to attract a man.

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To attract a woman who likes women? I guess I don't get that thinking - not all men are into women, not all women are into men, right? :idontknow: Whatever floats your boat. ;)

When dressed I am a lesbian. when not hetero. Dont have the desire for a man at all. Thought about it ... Naaa!

Other than a bit of kissing, no. I'm mainly attracted to females, but occasionally have been attracted to other TG women.

Carol

Not interested in men. Been married to the only two women i've ever had sex with.

I am Bi all the way. I had my first "encounter" with a man when I was 16. I was a gymnast in highschool and wasn't into dressing like I am today. then I would (please forgive me) hitch-hike on Sunset Blvd. and be just as comfortable with a man who wanted sex, or to take pictures, etc. (in the late 60"s this was almost the norm in Hollywood). Now (I'm 56) I still enjoy sexual activities with men and women, but my "Love and Romance" and emotions belong to my wife.

xxx, Evie

I think that women are so 'absolutely wonderful' that I would never want to be with a guy. But to each his own.

Up until now I have only been with women but I have been Bi for probably most of my life. And if I ever meet a guy that im comfortable with I would really like to have the experience. It will have to be right and in a relaxed atmisfear but im going to have an encounter sooner or later. I think it would real nice to have my first experience with a couple and I would like it to be more of a love making session. As I say, it would have to be right.

never been with a man, and never will. I love women always whether I am dressed as a male or female.

sorry gotta say that I am 100% hetero.

I've always been attracted to women. There are some that I've been close to and known that I will never get anywhere with them sexually and it makes me feel angry and alone. But lately I have been semi-fantasizing about giving men oral sex. It seems like more fun then oral sex with women. I'm yet to do either. I don't like the thought of being gay, though. All the social stigma would drive me to suicide. What do you have to say about this?

Well...perhaps crossdressing could be interpreted as a form of unconscious homosexual behaviour.Witness the vigour with witch most CDs deny any homosexual leanings...

I would like to believe that most CD's are very open-minded people and are all-inclusive; Therefore we have some gay, bi and straight in our mists!

Me personally I am bi, but have only a few experiences with men.
Like satin_luva above, I did "fantasize" about giving oral to a man many, many years before I actually had the opportunity to put my fantasy into reality. It is something I really enjoy doing with another man, actually it is the only "sex act" that I will do with another man. :heehee:

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Originally Posted by satin_luva

I don't like the thought of being gay, though. All the social stigma would drive me to suicide. What do you have to say about this?

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I'd say that's pretty sad. :sad:

Put me down as VERY bi-curious. Whether dressed or not. Would not say no under the right circumstances. Would LOVE to find another cd'er to try this with:devil:

I hear a lot of you speak of your wives and how kind and supportive they are. My wife and I of almost 10 years are splitting up; the divorce is almost final. She threatens me constantly about my crossdressing (e.g. calling my job and telling my co-workers) The thing is, while I did crossdress before we were married, and I was single; I stopped doing it during the marriage. She only knew because I told her. I guess at this point I am distrustful of any new relationship. I need to crossdress, there is something so deep in my psyche ever since I can remember. My soon-to-be ex satisfied me and alleviated that need until she chose to punish me sexually. I guess you could say my marriage sucked, except for my 8 year old who I live for. I'm trying to find time and energy to build a credible femme personality. Sometimes I fantasize being a woman with a man; but I don't think I could do it. Or maybe I don't think I could pull it off. But never, a man with another man.

Being bi-sexual, whether dressed or not I have no preferences as to gender of a partner. So far, when dressed, I have only been hit on by guys out for a bj or more, but if he's cute then what the hell.

My wife is OK with that, so long as I take precautions. She even encouraged me with a male friend who commented on my manhood, so she could watch. Voyeurism is her kick.

I've only had sex with women. I am attracted to women. However I am curious about being with another man. The thoughts about a same sex encounter have become stronger as time has gone by. We'll see what happens.

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Originally Posted by onceinawhile

I hear a lot of you speak of your wives and how kind and supportive they are. My wife and I of almost 10 years are splitting up; the divorce is almost final. She threatens me constantly about my crossdressing I guess you could say my marriage sucked, except for my 8 year old who I live for.

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I can relate totally, My first (I was around 20something was in to playing and experimenting, (somewhat of an enabler) my second understood but didn't encourage or want to participate, and was the mother of my son (at the time of our divorce he was 8 also), my third, was not only an enabler but helped me buy sexy dresses, pants, bras, shoes, etc. but when push came to shove during our split up she denied having any interest in my CD at all. Now my current 4th and absolutely love of my life (12 years now) knows of my past, accepts it for what it was but doesn't know I still do it, and more now than ever.

I have found out that letting it all out at the beginning of a relationship is (for me) the best, especially if you plan on continuing.

:) xxx, Evie

I am not ruling it out, but so far I haven't met any men that I was sexually attracted to.

Let me start by saying you ladies who are married for 20+ years are my role model. My wife and I have known each other for nearly 17 years, married for 8, and well on our way to reaching the 20 year and beyond mark. As for my sexuality, I consider myself bisexual. but I only recently came "out" about my orientation. During high school, I had several encounters with a friend. I never dressed in front of him, except once. I wore his mothers bathing suit in the hot tub for him. I looked back on this as just a phase and considered myself pure hetro.

When my wife and I were dating, we would talk for many hours about me dressing and the fantasy of being with a guy while dressed. While out on dates, we would look at guys and girls and discuss what we would look for, body wise, if we were to explore more. This talking continued for many years and recently, we were very close to having a three way with a fellow dresser. During the discussions with my wife about having a three way, I concluded I was Bi, and my wife is accepting of it. Now we can only hope to one day be given the opportunity again for that three way. :D

Nope!

I've thought about this at some length and come to the conclusion that if the person was right I might take the next step. By right person I mean another crossdresser. The other person would definately have to be fully dressed as a woman for me to be interested.