Male lesbians

[ReineD]

My SO likes me just fine, whether I jokingly refer to myself as a "male lesbian" or not.

But Sophie, there's the difference. I don't think anyone would fault a CD who says he is a male lesbian if he says it jokingly and others know it is a joke. And it may well be that others here says it jokingly as well, but I'm under the impression that some CDs do think they are lesbian. It just doesn't make sense to use this term, unless we are prepared to change the meaning of the word 'lesbian'. A wife whose acceptance is precarious, will believe that if her husband thinks of himself as a lesbian, then it must surely mean he believes he is a woman. It's just a confusing term, even if it is a fun thing to say.

A more accurate way to describe the sexual preference of a CD who likes women (and who doesn't like to think of himself as male when dressed), is "gynephile" (a lover of women). Also, I quite agree with Lorileah's point. Any CD who uses his male parts when having sex with women while dressed is not behaving like a lesbian.

No, I would say it's a huge freakin' leap to go from "I'm a 'male lesbian'" to "I'm a gay male." The former is obviously a way of saying, "When I'm dressed, I still like women." It has nothing to do with wanting a man.

When I hear the term "male lesbian", I think of a pre-op TS who is still a biological male although this is waning due to HRT, since she has no functioning penis. The 'lesbian' part identifies her as a woman, not a man, and it is just a question of time before the 'male' part is dropped. And of course a post-op (or non-op) TS can drop the 'male' part and simply say she is a lesbian. (There are TSs who for a variety of reasons cannot have SRS).

I don't know why some people have to wander out of their self-imposed ghetto to yell in our faces, "YOU ARE NOT ONE OF US!." OK. Fine. We get it. You've made your point. Now bugger off!

Oh, and thanks Reine for creating a new epithet for the haters to hurl around.

It is not the people in this thread who are saying that CDs are not included in the lesbian community. It is the lesbians themselves who do not want relationships with men who have penises. (Generally speaking). I'm sorry, but it is what it is. The people in this thread who are arguing against using the term "male lesbian" are simply advocating for a term that better reflects the reality of life in the lesbian community. Honestly, any CD who walks into a lesbian bar and announces himself as a male lesbian, wouldn't be taken seriously. And if he is married to a hetero GG, then his wife won't take kindly to being the second half of a lesbian couple.

... but, if both partners are OK with any term they wish to call themselves, then all is good!