Quote Originally Posted by ReineD View Post
But Sophie, there's the difference. I don't think anyone would fault a CD who says he is a male lesbian if he says it jokingly and others know it is a joke. And it may well be that others here says it jokingly as well, but I'm under the impression that some CDs do think they are lesbian.
The thread started with a quote from a comedian, and got several humorous responses. The only people I've seen taking it seriously are the ones condemning the term.

It just doesn't make sense to use this term, unless we are prepared to change the meaning of the word 'lesbian'.
Then it doesn't make any sense to use the terms 'she', 'her', and 'girl' when talking about CDs either, yet we do. Are you going to crusade against that usage also? Wouldn't that be far more upsetting to a wife who doesn't understand us than the term "male lesbian?" At least using the latter affirms that we are male.

A wife whose acceptance is precarious, will believe that if her husband thinks of himself as a lesbian, then it must surely mean he believes he is a woman. It's just a confusing term, even if it is a fun thing to say.
That's between him and his wife. One might be inclined to offer him some gentle advice on the subject, but I don't see any reason for strident condemnation.

A more accurate way to describe the sexual preference of a CD who likes women (and who doesn't like to think of himself as male when dressed), is "gynephile" (a lover of women).
I have no problem with that term, but it's not one that would communicate anything to most people, whereas "male lesbian" is instantly recognizable.

Also, I quite agree with Lorileah's point. Any CD who uses his male parts when having sex with women while dressed is not behaving like a lesbian.
Yeah, I don't get that. First of all, it's male lesbian, so of course we're using our male parts, and second of all, lesbians have been known to make use of male parts during sex.

When I hear the term "male lesbian", I think of a pre-op TS who is still a biological male although this is waning due to HRT, since she has no functioning penis. The 'lesbian' part identifies her as a woman, not a man, and it is just a question of time before the 'male' part is dropped. And of course a post-op (or non-op) TS can drop the 'male' part and simply say she is a lesbian. (There are TSs who for a variety of reasons cannot have SRS).
I think it's considered rude to refer to a pre-op TS as "male" just because the surgery hasn't taken place yet.

It is not the people in this thread who are saying that CDs are not included in the lesbian community. It is the lesbians themselves who do not want relationships with men who have penises.
Okay, but us using this term doesn't somehow trap them into an obligation to have sex with us. I haven't seen anyone here argue that lesbians should want to have sex with CDs just because we wear dresses.

Honestly, any CD who walks into a lesbian bar and announces himself as a male lesbian, wouldn't be taken seriously. And if he is married to a hetero GG, then his wife won't take kindly to being the second half of a lesbian couple.
That's good advice for anyone who was confused on that score, but the desire to give advice doesn't explain the angry tone that some people were taking. It doesn't explain why we were being told "suck it up people you are straight men."