And this is precisely my experience. I won't go into the details here other than to say in my case, the ex knew how to play the game better. He has the money, he was dishonest, ruthless, and he won custody. I learned too late. It also didn't hurt that his attorney and the Judge are friends.Originally Posted by docrobbysherry
Remember, THE LAW has NOTHING to do with FAIRNESS! It's who's story is BETTER! From what I've seen, fabrications in court r the RULE, NOT the exception!
I do have a thought. It is my understanding that when individuals, and I am guessing they are mostly women, file Orders of Protection, the law doesn't take much time to deliberate just in case there is a real danger. The accused is immediately barred from having any contact, until he can prove that he is not a threat. In principle this makes sense because it errs on the side of caution. Compare this to someone being falsely arrested. It would be best to cooperate and later on prove that the arrest was false.
So now BF just needs to show up in front of the judge and prove that he is not a threat to the kids. The Judges' priority is the children's welfare, not what goes on behind your bedroom door. BF doesn't need to contradict himself to his attorney, and the attorney should know what ammunition the ex is likely to use. But if, for the purposes of the custody hearing, BF treats the CDing as being part of his private, intimate life with a consenting adult, then how can the Judge take it as negatively impacting the children? This also would not be a lie as concerns the children, since BF has not CDed in front of them. It should be made clear to the Judge that neither BF and the ex, nor BF and you, ever engaged in intimate adult behaviors in front of the children. Does this make sense?
It appears as if, in order to get custody, the ex wants to use what happens behind closed doors and twist it into a behavior that will hurt the kids. Seems to me that such blatant lies should reflect negatively on her. She is obviously not thinking of the kids' best interests if she wants to deprive them of one of their parents.
