I agree that baby steps are probably a totally worthless concept... Your SO is either going to totally accept your crossdressing or she isn't... Those that fall somewhere in between hope and pray that by doing baby steps it will push her towards the 100% acceptance side but how often does that really work? From what I've read usually there is a slight slide towards acceptance then a backlash towards total rejection.. In my humble opinion.
So if that's the case..... you might as well just get all dressed up and pop out of the closet. " SURPRISE". and see what she thinks... And get the inevatible over with.. Baby steps is just wasting everyones valuable time?? Also in my humble opinion