Originally Posted by Violetgray
While this may be true to a certain extent...coming out whether it be before or after the fact is basically going to be a crap shoot. Some people are going to accept it...some won't. Being up front and honest isn't going to guarantee a happy ending. What it will guarantee is fairness. It gives the other person the opportunity to freely choose whether or not this is something that they can live with. Whether you see it as fair or unfair and whether people agree or disagree with you is a moot point. people are going to make up their minds and in a lot of cases they are going to stick to their convictions. You can sit people down and educate them until the cows come home, and they may be convinced that there is in fact nothing wrong with it, but still have the opinion that this isn't something that they want in their lives. No one ever said that life is fair, and the chips are going to fall where they may.
A couple of people have posted analogies.. let me add mine
We have closeted cross dressers, try as we might to convince them that their world will not crumble if they venture out, why don't they? Fear whether real or imagined is a very strong deterrent. We can show 1,000's of cases where people get out there and are not hunted down and slaughtered by roving bands of cross dresser hunters. We can give tons of examples of happy lives lived as people see fit, and we can read a multitude of testimonials, so why aren't these people convinced?
Now turn it around and put the wife or SO in place of the cder.. What is the difference?
:2c:
Kel
