Shoulda's-coulda's-woulda's all over the place in this posting be careful not to step in any of them!
If only we all knew what really goes on between two people. I've been married 3 times and the third time is and was the charm. It took me years of hiding who I was before I could begin a new way of being in a relationship by talking about my crossdressing. Even then it took several years (and $ debt) seeing a psychiatrist to insure my own personal sanity. Thank God I'm only a crossdresser!
I did what I needed to do for ME to be able to find a loving supportive relationship. Had I not done the personal work of self analysis I would not have been able to love both me and another person at the same time. Gee! it only took 40+ years of life-lessons to get there!
Here is my psycho-babble...
Our what-if's always rule our "monkey minds" so until you personally can calm those conversations down in your head it's challenging to follow your heart...
My only advice is to Talk, to Listen, to Ask for Clarity. Then ask if they have anything to say, Listen, Listen, Listen. Then ask yourself... How can I have compassion for their needs? Equally important is how can I ask for their compassion for my needs. Then wait, do nothing, sit with your "monkey minds" swinging from doubt to worry... then wait some more before you both make a kind and loving decision on how to move forward in life... together or individually ... just not in reverse.
Good Luck!
