In hindsight... I was pretty stupid

[Rianna Humble]

when Emma got to know the whole truth about me, she imposed 2 rules;
-Never wear her clothes
-Don't change your body to a more feminine look that is permenant or long lasting eg never shave your legs, pluck your brow to a pencl line or pierce your ears. Upper body shaving is accepted as some blokes will do this anyway.
The reason for this rule was simple, when I'm out of skirts and stockings, she wants her bloke back and not a girly boy in mens clothes.
These rules were agreed upon at the start. I had no problem with it, I understood every reason implicitly, she even suggested something called dance skins if I wanted my legs to appear smooth... more on this later).

Boundaries were set and agreed, a positive alternative was offered to the leg-shaving. These boundaries are about trust between two individuals. If Smile had felt them unreasonable, she could have disagreed, but she didn't.

"SHIT! I've shaved my bloody legs!!!!"
I'd have to deal with this later.

I blurted out,
"Er, I need to appologise, Ive kinda shaved my legs..."

Anyway, long and short of it is this
- I knew the rules and boundaries, I broke them.
She got my wig out and cut it in half right infront of me.
I was told I could have a replacement when my hair grew back.

Then she went to my femme clothes with a bin-bag, put all my stuff in the bag and locked them in the old car that is currently SORN, she has the only keys with her now.
I was told I could have it all back when my hair grew back.

Trust was betrayed and the betrayal was met by a measured response - whether or not we agree with the measure

I actually find this fair.

I broke the rules, now my enjoyment of something has been restricted for however long it takes to grow hair.

Smile agrees that she deserved some comeback for betraying her SO's trust. Even the destruction of the wig was accompanied by the promise of a new one when Smile once again complies with the promises she had made.

Boy, are YOU pussy whipped!!

This seems a pretty one way relationship.

Really and how do you come to that conclusion?

I'm with Sandra here, no pussy-whipping, just an immediate response to a betrayal of trust. I'm sure Emma didn't sign up to living with a cross-dresser, but thought she was getting a cisgendered male.

When she either found out or was told by smile, she didn't throw her out, but asked her to agree to some measures to maintain trust. And smile did agree willingly.

Her reaction was destructive and a huge red flag for your future going bad. If you think about it, it seems she was just waiting for you to do something so she could go off on you.

I see no evidence at all for such an assertion

Let's say next time you buy a magazine she doesn't like so she breaks your reading glasses (or, some comparable tit for tat exchange).

If smile has previously agreed that she will not buy that magazine on pain of losing her SO's support for Smile's reading, then and only then would this be a reasonable simile. Under any other circumstances, it is plainly and simply ridiculous.

You both knew that and you both, for your own individual short-sighted reasons, made "rules" for PERSONAL behavior. But, in writing or not, you can't waive your rights to your PERSONAL thoughts and personal actions. If you have an itch, you have the unalienable right to scratch it - "contracts" don't apply.

Would you apply the same logic to an alcoholic? Never mind that they have promised their SO that they will no longer drink, if the urge comes over them, they should break their promise and return to alcoholism? That would be the logical outworking of your reasoning.

As to relationships... She knew you crossdressed and she should know everyone slips up here and there in life.

This is the only part of your post that makes sense to me. She knows that people slip up and she has provided a very strong aid to Smile avoiding that slip-up in future. Emma has not banned Smile from ever cross-dressing again. She has given Smile a chance to earn back the trust that was betrayed, and promised her a new wig to reinforce that behaviour.

I have discussed this with a few of my friends including a married couple who have been together for years and they all agree that cutting the wig was way out of line. Unless you are in a Dominant submissive relationship then this isn't how it should be and I suggest telling her that she went too far and talking about it.

I don't understand no-one who condemns the wig-cutting attaches any significance to the promise of a new wig in a few weeks time.