First, I'm going to say that I didn't read all of the responses to your post, so I may repeat some things.

Where do I start? I also feel like there is a third person in my marriage. T tells me its him, but then wants me to call him Rebecca. Doesn't make sense. He acts differently.

I don't feel comfortable w/ any intimacy while he is dressed. So, therefore, I hate when he dresses b/c I lose my husband for an entire day. (i'm a stay at home mom to 4 kids, so thats a big deal) While my heart knows I am more important than the dressing, my head tells me that he is choosing dressing over cuddling w/ me.

Many women who are completely accepting change from day to day how they feel about it. I can vary from minute to minute.

If he just told u a few weeks ago, and he has dressed several times, maybe he needs to slow down. You need to explain how you feel. My feeling is that he is uncomfortable w/himself, which is why he becomes so quiet. T and I sat down and compromised a list of ground rules. They included all sensitive areas. (if u would like to know what they were, pm me. I will not post them here) It did include how many times the dressing would be appropriate for our family and us, as a couple. We used them for a few months, then they changed slightly. (more unwritten, though)

You're already much further than me, as I also have self-esteem issues and I am already dealing w/PPD. (post pardum depression)

Most women go thru the same feelings that you are right now. Don't let anyone tell you that if you love him, then you should accept him as is. You can love him and accept who he is and still be uncomfortable with the cding. You are a loving woman who is trying to be okay with something you probably never even thought about before. That takes courage in itself. Our counselor reminds me how much courage it takes. There are alot of women who would leave, instead af facing the challenge. You may even want to think about counseling, if just to act as mediator for discussions. Good luck to you. Try to get 10 posts so you can join the FAB forum. (i know exactly how hard it was for you to post this. I was there not long ago and it took me 2 months to post my first one)