Wendy,

While I like your general idea, historically, "passing," as a term was never "as normal" but as passing for something you are not. Blacks could be taken for white, Jews could be taken for Aryans... It's one thing appearing to be another. That's not "normal"; it's hoping no one notices you're not normal.

Aside from that point about what "passing" usually means, I do like the idea of "normal" being your foremost thought. My observation of most people is that they can get away with almost anything if they otherwise act generally like everyone else.

It never occurred to me to be shy about crossdressing, and my experience has always been to just go about my business "as normal" when crossdressed. People take their main cues from what I say and do, not from what I am wearing.

Perhaps it's because they can never be sure, on sight alone, if I'm in a play, on my way to "punk" someone, or, just really "out there" on my own. If we speak about something other than my agenda at the time, I respond as I would to anyone at anytime, and while they might go away puzzled, it's no more harm done than if I were shopping at Sears in an admiral's uniform. Sometimes, you just gotta do what you gotta do... For them, it's mostly just an interesting bit of their day.

It surprises most people, by the way, that I have been hassled by "gay bashers" rarely, and only when dressed as a guy, doing the most mundane things - such as getting my car washed or crossing the street to return a library book. It had, as it turned out, more to do with the part of town I was in - and the jerks who came trolling there - than it did me or anyone else. It's only happened a few times in my life, and never when crossdressed. I'm not gay - and other people being gay is nothing I'm interested in worrying about.

Exploring such things a bit further, I think you also touched specifically upon an aspect of life that I'd like to comment on: "Getting beaten up" is a hazard of life and always has been. If someone thinks they need to take some self defense courses, learn how to use a weapon or two, and, needs to get or stay in shape because of a possible car jacking, mugging, or, just running into some rowdies, then they're probably right. Even if they don't think about it, they should probably do it anyway...

Your right to self defense realistically starts and ends with you needing and being able to protect yourself; it is not only, or, entirely useful as "the law" in some text book somewhere.

Last, and related to this "self defense" notion, is that the best protection against being fired, run out of town, etc. is being very very good at something of value to other people. Be a GREAT singer, be a GREAT accountant, be a GREAT something. That way you'll always have value somewhere, and wind up broke and alone nowhere. It's not much perhaps, and you may be underpaid for your skills, but it's easier to manage life with some practical value to others in hand, than to have very little to offer beyond your mere existence on the planet.

Nice post. Be more of yourself.