Quote Originally Posted by ReineD

If the gender divide were caused by an overly strict and stereotypical gender socialization mechanism and if it did not sit well with most of these male-socialized men, believe me there would be a much greater segment of the male population wishing to break free from it in adulthood.
I will agree with Asche and say it is not that simple.

Just some points to consider.

1. Everything you observe in male and female behaviors are after the fact, meaning everyone has already been thoroughly brainwashed into their gender socialization behaviors. Sure there are variations and rebels but there is no way to ascertain how masculine the average male would be if he grew up without this rigid gender structure because they are no examples out there you will encounter.
2. Science has looked at gender behavior and conducted numerous experiments and studies. There are plenty of books about this you can read. Science has a hard time finding any basis in believing that gender behaviors are based on genetics. Pretty much everything you assume an average male to be defined as appears to be based solely on the gender socialization. Look up the science.
3. Gender socialization does not just affect children. Everyday, every hour we are being bombarded by numerous signs and situations that reinforce the binary system. It is constantly being reinforced so only a concerted effort can break through it - meaning a man must WANT to be feminine in order to overcome the mental roadblocks.
4. If the traditional female socialization mechanism was so strict and unpalatable then why did the feminist movement only appear in the 20th century? There should be a long history dating back to the beginnings of human civilization of women protesting their role and demanding to break free and acquire male roles. This is not so because women did not think there was an alternative. The same is true of men today - men don't want femininity because they believe this is not a viable or desirable alternative behavior - because they were brought up to think this way and without a masculist movement to open their minds this will remain so.
5. The old social movement equation. Society understands why women would want to "improve" themselves by becoming more masculine but society thinks men moving down the social ladder by becoming feminine is a perversion of human nature. By nature, we seek to improve our lot and be more successful. Men wanting to become more feminine goes against this most elementary rule.
6. Masculinity is actually defined by being the opposite to femininity. A masculine man has no feminine attributes. Masculine men are successful in business and with the opposite sex so there is no glaring advantage why a man would want to develop feminine attributes when this would shatter the masculine aura and so is clearly disadvantageous.

The point is you believe boys want to be boys based on your observations of males who are being controlled by the factors listed above and are unable/unaware that they have a feminine side and it is ok to express it except in specific situations like being with a girlfriend. The only males you know who actively want to pursue feminine behaviors are crossdressers and sometimes gays. For every other male the mere thought of developing femininity is an immediate turn-off. You say girls want to be girls but I don't think that is the case anymore. Girls want to be girls and boys at the same time.