Let's not get too far afield. The OP wants to get her groove on, but she's concerned about rockin' the world of some poor straight guy to the extent that he no longer wants real women.

My advice to her, is simply go girl, and let the chips fall where they may. If he's interested in a CD gal, than he's already got desires, and if the experience wakes him up and he becomes openly bi or gay and no longer a 'phobic asshole on the DL, then we all win.

Let's all go out and convert a few straight dudes!