We all have hard days, Bree. I had one yesterday, you can read it in this forum. After stomping my feet and having a few people smack me upside the head with the reality that I am choosing to not transition at this point of my life (yes, it's a choice), I went out tonight and bought a new nail polish and a tank-top in a color I wanted. So now I'm doing my nails as I respond to you, and thinking about my future. I am contemplating options, not feeling sorry that I have to decide.
I know how hard it can be to look in the mirror sometimes. If an outside opinion matters to you, all you have to do is ask.
Anna