Getting out in 2013

[Ceri Anne]

The biggest road block to going out is you! Once you get past your own fears and just take the step, its easy and exciting, beyond exciting. My first week dressing fully, I went out in 3 different cities. I started by going to gay bars that had drag shows and had no problems. Since then I have gone shopping en femme, to resturaunts, to casinos and never had a problem. You will get a snicker or two here and there, maybe a stare, but unless your in your home town, nobody really knows you. It is easier to go with someone the first time. I recomend using the meeting thread on here to find girls in your area or wherever your planning to go to and setting up a meeting at a public location. Good luck and enjoy.

[Karli]

Thank you for the feedback. It's a big step so that's why I was wanting to know what it was like for others. I find the thought of even walking from say a parking lot to a bar a bit intimidating which is why I was wondering if having someone with you might make it easier. Also if you are in a bar I feel it might be a bit scary to be alone. Those who have done this, is this about right that first time? I'm sure if you have experience it is routine. But what about a first time out. How do you take that step?

[Jenniferathome]

...Also if you are in a bar I feel it might be a bit scary to be alone. Those who have done this, is this about right that first time? I'm sure if you have experience it is routine. But what about a first time out. How do you take that step?

Karli, I would not recommend going to a bar, alone. Here's why: think like a guy. What do you do when you see any woman enter a bar? You look. Scrutiny will be higher. Drunk men will look even longer. If you are in a gay bar, you may get hit on. If you are up for a drink or dinner, go to a small bistro. It won't be a pick up place. I highly recommend going to a shopping mall for your first outing alone. It is easier to blend there, if you care about that.

Good luck

[Karli]

Thanks for the encouragement. I was wondering if you thought a girl out having dinner alone might seem unusual or off. That's a bit why I thought a bar that is accepting might be the way to get out that first time.

[Sarah L]

The biggest road block to going out is you! Once you get past your own fears and just take the step, its easy and exciting, beyond exciting.

This is the truth! My first time out (not counting support group) should have been a disaster. I got spotted before I got to the store, my walk was terrible, my makeup wasn't too good. But, you know what? No one bothered me. When things don't go perfectly and you still come out alright, it gives you alot of courage.

One thing... When you get to where you're going, check your look and get out of the car right away. (S)he who hesitates is lost! We want to read all about your outing as soon as we can. Remember, we are all with you!

[Karli]

I def think getting out at night in a way feels safer. I know night is when danger can happen but it also hides a lot too don't you think? People might notice less?

Few things/questions on my mind:

1) I'm a little fearful about walking across a parking lot or garage...or at least I think I might be. I would think it sounds intimidating. So for those who have gone out, what was that like the first time? I've heard people mention downtown LV. But seems you would have to park and walk to go anywhere or get to a bar like Drink and Drag, etc.

2) if you are out what is the general reaction from other women?

3) If you are out and are approached by a man how do you handle that? Is it scary? (Seems it isn't be) Have you ever been hit on and how did you react?

[Sarah L]

I def think getting out at night in a way feels safer. I know night is when danger can happen but it also hides a lot too don't you think? People might notice less?

Few things/questions on my mind:

1) I'm a little fearful about walking across a parking lot or garage...or at least I think I might be. I would think it sounds intimidating. So for those who have gone out, what was that like the first time? I've heard people mention downtown LV. But seems you would have to park and walk to go anywhere or get to a bar like Drink and Drag, etc.

2) if you are out what is the general reaction from other women?

3) If you are out and are approached by a man how do you handle that? Is it scary? (Seems it isn't be) Have you ever been hit on and how did you react?

1) Well, my first time was a daylight outing.I went to a place that I didn't think it would be crowded (it wasn't) but it wasn't isolated either. For me, the walk across the parking lot was scary, you have to expect that. You were probably scared the first time you drove. But you didn't let it stop you.

2) Usually, I don't notice any reaction. I just don't pay attention to them. There are a few times when I've noticed them. They keep on going wherever they are going. One woman gave me the once over this weekend, but she didn't say anything. As far as cashiers in a store, they don't act like there is anything out of the ordinary. A couple of times there has been a reaction, but they recover quickly.

3) Never been aproached by a man (thankfully). If a guy hits on you, it probably means you blend in pretty well. So it might be a good thing.

Remember, they are more afraid of you, then you are of them.

You know, I think getting out dressed as a female is kind of like an innocent man breaking out of a prison. He's trying to gain his freedom while the cops are trying to pull him back to his cell. The difference is that you are the one trying to force yourself back into submission.

This is your escape and we are all rooting for you. Go Get 'Em!

[Jenniferathome]

3) If you are out and are approached by a man how do you handle that? Is it scary? (Seems it isn't be) Have you ever been hit on and how did you react?

Karli, this just happened to me last week and I shared it already but I'll reiterate here. I was out, in daytime, and a guy approached and complimented on my legs (I was in denim skirt). I did what I think any any woman would do: I turned and walked away without saying anything. Don't worry about it, it is so unlikely, like planning for a car crash.

THE most important thing is to walk with confidence. Don't think "I'm out dressed." You're just walking. Walk like you belong. That will make you feel more comfortable. It really is not that big of a deal. 99.999% of people will just walk past without a second thought. Don't worry about the .001%

[GinaD]

I def think getting out at night in a way feels safer. I know night is when danger can happen but it also hides a lot too don't you think? People might notice less?

Few things/questions on my mind:

1) I'm a little fearful about walking across a parking lot or garage...or at least I think I might be. I would think it sounds intimidating. So for those who have gone out, what was that like the first time? I've heard people mention downtown LV. But seems you would have to park and walk to go anywhere or get to a bar like Drink and Drag, etc.

2) if you are out what is the general reaction from other women?

3) If you are out and are approached by a man how do you handle that? Is it scary? (Seems it isn't be) Have you ever been hit on and how did you react?

Always consider being as safe as possible. Remote, dark areas are usually not safe for man or woman. Use your natural instincts. If you are not comfortable, don't venture there.

I have had mixed results from women. Comes with the game. Most don't really care one way or the other unless you are hitting on their SO.

The first time a man focused on me, I couldn't help going into panic mode as I was very young and hadn't thought that one out. After I watched girls deal with it, I would be polite but direct. If I was interested or not. Only on a few occasions did I experience someone being a jerk. Discretion being the better part of valor, I made a tactical retreat and sought entertainment elsewhere.

[Karli]

Always consider being as safe as possible. Remote, dark areas are usually not safe for man or woman. Use your natural instincts. If you are not comfortable, don't venture there.

I have had mixed results from women. Comes with the game. Most don't really care one way or the other unless you are hitting on their SO.

The first time a man focused on me, I couldn't help going into panic mode as I was very young and hadn't thought that one out. After I watched girls deal with it, I would be polite but direct. If I was interested or not. Only on a few occasions did I experience someone being a jerk. Discretion being the better part of valor, I made a tactical retreat and sought entertainment elsewhere.

How did you handle it? I guess that is why I wanted to think it out myself so I won't panic either. How have the experiences been with men who give you attention good or bad?

[Sarah L]

One thing you might not have thought about.
If you are concerned about running into guys, going out at night is the right way to do it. When you pull into a parking lot, you can see who is in the place.Try a convenience store. You will see who is working the counter(unless they have gone in back). If it's a guy, you can keep on going. I have done this kind of thing.

When I was still trying to dig up the courage, I did this alot. Subway restaurants are good for this,too. Since they don't have a typical fastfood kitchen, the person you would be running into is usually visible through their windows.

Just something to think about.

[docrobbysherry]

You'll get to meet and party with 75 to 100 T girls from all over the US.:drink:

It's in April. Here's the link: http://www.geekbabe.com/dlv/

What people don't realize is, the saying, "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas", applies to EVERYONE not just T girls!

I got hit on at the far end of a casino parking building late at nite at the last DLV. And, I mean ME! Not Sherry!
A very big, young guy. He was insistant and polite. I was lucky but it scared the crap out of me!

If it happened to me, ANYONE could get hit on there!:brolleyes:

[JessicaMN]

this is also something i want to do this year.

[Samantha_Smile]

I too plan to make 2013 'The Year'.
Nothing major, but I think I want to get out to a CD/TV club in south England called Pink Punters.
Seems to cater well to the CD crowd and many of my friends tell me it's great. So when it's less chilly here, Samantha's getting outdoors in a dress! :D

Good luck to all who plan to get out this year too

[Celeste]

I would definitely suggest finding a companion to go out with the first time.I had to be kinda dragged out my first time,I was way to scared to just go out on my own.I was fortunate in meeting a fellow girl who lived just a few hours away whom I invited for a visit.We hit it off right away but did not go out that night.For our next visit I traveled to her area where she knew a cdtg friendly establishment..it was to be my first night out.

I was absolutely petrified,my heart racing a million miles an hour as we went into the bar.....it really felt like skydiving with a compromised chute.She put her arm around me as we went in and said.."are you ok..we can go back to the room if your not ok".At that point,all the apprehension left me and her affection sent a warm glow all over me.The evening out was wonderful,but that that genuine moment of someone caring for me will last forever.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

Las Vegas is the best place to start be yourself and go with a group of girls it will be more fun and you will feel more relaxed.

[Chickhe]

The best thing to do it make small steps...maybe just go for a drive or a short trip somewhere close to home. This gives you time to perfect and reflect on your image. Then once you feel confidend enough do larger outings. The main thing that pushed me outside was the nagging feeling that I just had to do something other than being scared the rest of my life. I took the plunge and just kept getting better at it and I learned a lot. Now I feel great and CDing is actually a lot smaller part of my life emotionally.

[Lynn Marie]

[SIZE="3"]I was fortunate enough to have met a CD girlfriend right here on Crossdressers.com. This lovely lady came over to visit one evening and the following Friday she came over and out we went to an LGBT club in a city about 40 minutes south. What an amazing experience, and what fun having someone to share it with. I'm still pretty partial to going out with friends. I can, but I rarely go out alone.[/SIZE]

[Annette_boy]

Hi Hon

My first outing as Annette was in a group I was lucky there were about 11 of us .
A CDer I met on line was doing a girls night out and invited me I accepted . It was thrilling to be out as me.
That first step out the apartment door however was a tough one.I learndt one thing instantly with that first step:
1 No Sirens
2 No spotlights
3 No voice on loudspeaker yelling Achtung!! TRANNY!! TRANNY!!
4 No Guard dogs
5 No Guards to lock me up
It was my front door not Colditz that I was going out of and the fear left not to return thankfuly that was in 2005 right after I joined this site.
With the passage of time and the wonderful folk here I am now out and about full time. Fulltime might not be Karri's path or goal,we each have our own level of comfort .Just remember the first step is the hardest and our own fear is our worst enemy.
Hugs Annette:D:D