I dislike DADT. I think it originates in a lack of communication that I personally could not cope with in an intimate relationship.
BUT beware Pamela (and others). Beware you do not fall into the trap of patronising an SO. You do not know that couples circumstances. Maybe the CD individual is also very selfish and thinks of nothing other than him/herself when crossdressing. Maybe the SO is treated like something of an optional extra, a handbag if you like to complete the fantasy for the CD? Maybe the CD cannot express their feelings or needs without either getting angry or sulking (both situations have been described in relationships on these forums).
So, if you and your SO are in a DADT relationship, DONT tell them or ask them to go to therapy. You BOTH need therapy, together. DADT is a communication problem between two individuals, not one individuals problem to be "fixed" like a stuck door.
