Still haven't seen it!Originally Posted by Zooey
At least Paula didn't give away the location of our Unicorn sanctuary.
GM
Didn't mean it as perhaps you read it.
I was highlighting how easy it is for someone to pull out a few misfortunate words and make a deal out of.
It wasn't supposed to be a dig at you rather an effort to show everyone "Look people say stuff, we're not all wordsmiths try not be so sensitive".
I would imagine most everyone on this thread is tolerant, people that aren't tolerant wouldn't engage or if they did it's something short and sharp with no intent to join in to the greater discussion. Eg If a thread was discussing a definition and someone only posts: "Labels are for cans" which if you break down that sentence means "I'm intolerant of this discussion and have no time or care to learn why this is important to you, therefore I dismiss you all with this perfunctory put down".
Most of what we debate/argue is about context rather than personal I think. Most of our most inquisitive contributors on this forum tell it how it is and are strong enough to engage in the conversation and voice their opinion.
Won't be the first or last time someone has disagreed with my point of view and I have left to mull it over and rethink my approach.
If someone is passionate in their argument I wonder why, have I missed something? am I seeing this the wrong way? It's healthy to have debate and we must be tolerant also, but you won't find the more deep and meaningful answers if you're too insecure to listen to the harsher truths.
I remember first joining the TS section I got some harsh criticism for some of my comments and even accused a few members of being bitter and above themselves.
Those discussions were sometimes hard to take but ultimately I started to understand why.
I wasn't even part-time at that point, I had a few delusions and was projecting my inexperienced ideology onto people who had been there and done it. It's not until I was far into transition that many of those discussions started to make sense, I was better prepared and now making informed decisions.
I've learned so much from that group now I understand just how important the truth is even if it hurts, if you are even dabbling with the idea of living full-time you need to have really stripped away all pretence and be prepared to look deep into your self. That won't happen if people have to tippy toe around you because you're identity is so fragile you take offense to someone questioning your motives.
No disrespect to anyone but the majority of people on this part of the forum are having fun, fantasy or fetish. It's not life changing and the risks are mostly of the possibility of getting caught.
The TS section is all about the reality of seeing it through to living it everyday, sexism, marginalisation, prejudice, family and friends turning on you, jobs and homes at risk even health.
It's serious, so while the TS section seems harsh it's not really when you think of the consequences of this being your everyday life.
If someone pops in and is scared off by a few strong replies, what does that say about them and how serious they are? If they're too delicate to stand and duke it out then they simply aren't ready.
I'm going to get told of for this but I still believe there should be another section for those who maybe fluid or somewhere in the middle. Where discussions of being fluid or struggling with balancing two different gender expressions are not hijacked by more fantasy or fetish based CDing. I believe that group of people come to the TS section because they are beyond much of the discussion here but soon find they don't fit there either and lacking any designated forum are left feeling unwanted and angry.
Thanks everyone that has contributed to this thread, some really great insight from all perspectives.
