Woman vs Female

[sometimes_miss]

Look carefully at these women's style of clothing, their faces, body types and ages. Would it be your aim to look like any of them

Yes. Several of them, in fact. What you forget (as I guess most women do) is that WE have to overcome our masculine bodies in order to help ourselves feel feminine. YOU and all those other women, do not. Which is why so many of us dress 'over the top' so much. In particular, the women second from the left, and third from the right. Added problem is, we can only see 8 of the 17 women in that picture clearly. But I understand why you wrote what you did. Hope you can understand why I did.

My wife is very much struggling with this right now in my CD life. "Why do you want to wear a bra if you don't want to become a woman?"

then

However, in other ways I'm completely immature - I play dress-up like a little girl

And there's your answer. I don't know if she'll accept it, but it IS an answer to why you are doing it. People like trying on other's roles (and in some cases, clothes for those roles, witness all the re-enactment guys at those weekend war retreats and veterans places where they periodically go back to their soldier outfits that they haven't worn in 50 years). Perhaps not permanently, but we do like to continue to do that through our lives. Whether just for fun, or to feel better about ourselves.

Having the feeling of dressing pretty, wearing a bra or anything else associated does not give you a feeling of being a woman. That is just clothing and being a woman runs much much much deeper than what you are wearing. It is a lived experience that until you actually go live it you will never understand.

As we will never get to 'live it', that experience will forever remain an enigma to us. So all we have, is to grasp at the best information and experience that we CAN have. So we dress up, make up, wear heels, nail polish, and accessorize as best we can, and try to imagine the rest, based on what we know.
There is no better option for us.